[struggling2]

can situations be considered sexual abuse if they were not
about sexual stimulation of the perpetrator or child? but mostly
involved bad boundaries that involved nakedness, inappropriate comments (not at me or about me just to me about other females), etc. Sorry if this is vague. Im just really confused.

[mimsies]

Sexual abuse is as often as not about power rather than sex, so yes, it can be. And subjecting a child to inappropriate sexual content/behavior/etc.can certainly be sexual abuse.

[unaluna]

Agree. Making certain comments to you about other females is considered sexual abuse. I asked this specific question for my own situation.

[RedSun]

Yes, because situations like this can make you very unclear about your sexual boundaries and identity. Some instances of sexual abuse can be really damaging, no one was ever touched, but sexualisation, for example at a young age, or by a relative, can still make that person feel like a sexual object.

[Homeira]

I believe that sexual harassment is a form of sexual abuse. It occurs in situations where a person with authority seeks to further establish that authority. It has a devastating psychological effect on the victim, and that is the intention of the abuser. Sexual derogotary language, even if it is about other people, serves the same purpose; namely to put down others in a sexualized manner. It also has a psycological effect on the listener, especially when that listener is child. It is the person in authority defining what is acceptable sexual conduct. It makes it hard for a child to establish his or hers own sexual boundaries.

[struggling2]

thank you for your responses...i really struggle with this because my dad had very inappropriate boundaries in these ways...but i dont feel he even realized it was inappropriate. he claims that now he understands that he was inappropriate. i always read that the perpetrator is doing these things on purpose to exert control/power or for sexual gratification.....i dont feel like that was the case....he was just inappropriate cause thats just how he is. he seems remorseful for his behavior. so confusing. it was definetely damaging....but its hard without the actual physical act of sexual abuse....i dont know why i feel this is so much more easily forgiveable....maybe because he's my dad and in other ways he was a really good dad...while my mom was emotionally unavailable and always caught up in her anxiety. so confusing

[Homeira]

If your father realizes that what he has done was wrong, then maybe all of you could get some help through family theraphy? Maybe your mother would also join? It might be a step in a better direction, if it is important for you to maintain a relationship with him.