[Nihil]

So when I was a kid, my father basically conditioned me not to cry. He didn't abuse me physically, and I don't remember exactly anything he might've said, but I know he tried to intimidate me to some degree, because he "didn't want any ********" from my mother, (at one point I cried when doing homework) and I probably told my mother about it. All I know is that he used fear to intimidate me. I even vaguely recall something he said when I was older, it was something along the lines that using fear/having a "commanding voice" is all you need to parent effectively. I think I haven't cried since childhood, and I may have been stunted emotionally as a result.

[Skeezyks]

The Skeezyks was always scared of his father. He was intimidating & was physically abusive when I was very young. Looking back, I'm not sure if he whipped me in an effort to break me early, or if he thought it would toughen me up.

I learned a lot while I was still very young, I don't know how, or from whom. I learned there were things I must never talk about. I learned to be secretive... to hide. And I learned I'd better keep my mouth shut if I knew what was good for me. I still carry those lessons around with me today... so many decades later.

[MyPOV]

I am with you -- and I also cannot recall what happened to make me not cry. I think it has to do with often getting in trouble because emotional reactions to things around me (other kids taunting, etc) would get out of hand and be VERY inappropriate because I just wanted to fit in and never felt like I did.

So I stopped trusting my emotions because they got me in trouble and haven't cried except when family members have passed, and even then felt EXTREMELY ashamed for having done so....I also NEVER remember seeing my dad cry, except at this dad's funeral.

On the other hand, I will watch a TV show or even some commercials and have to stifle the tears....I know I am softy inside, but was trained/taught to suppress that.

So I get ya -- working with therapist with that and hopefully it will change.

[TerriLynn]

He was mentally abusive. He put the fear of violence in you. That is abuse.

My step mom said to me, stop crying or I'll give you something to cry about.