[ciro]

Hiya, first time posting here.

I'm in therapy, and have been with my current therapist for nearly 2 years now. We've just begun to delve into DBT for my BPD/Borderline tendencies, but my own belief is a lot of what I experience now is because of a very abusive relationship I was in, and that I left immediately before beginning with this therapist.

I've talked about it, and the topic comes up when I occassionally see/deal with my abuser, but I've been very light on details, and because of my guarded personality regarding the trauma (cause, y'know, abuse) I've talked a lot about how I think it didn't affect me much.

Now that we're beginning DBT, he keeps mentioning parts of the manual we are using that we won't use because it's trauma related. I'm beginning to fear I'll never process my trauma entirely, but I also unfortunately have social anxiety disorder, and feel immense shame about what happened.

How do I tell him I want my trauma to be a part of our therapy, when I've hardly mentioned it for the last 2 years? I feel like I will sound like I'm lying, or something.

[Skeezyks]

Hello ciro: Since this is your first time posting here on PC... welcome to PsychCentral! I hope you find the time you spend here to be of benefit. May I suggest that you introduce yourself over in the New Members Introductions forum? Here's a link:

https://forums.psychcentral.com/new-...introductions/

I'm sorry I don't really have much of anything novel I can suggest with regard to your concern. From my perspective, I think all you can do is tell him. Alternatively, I guess perhaps you could write a letter to be delivered prior to an upcoming appointment, or send an e-mail, if it's just too difficult for you to bring the subject up in person.

There's a lot of support that can be available here on PC. The more you post, & reply to other members' posts, the more a part of the community you will become. Plus there are the chat rooms where you'll be able to interact with other PC members in real time (once your first 5 posts have been reviewed & approved.) So please keep posting!

[dlantern]

Inhale, share a few details then see how it goes. Be brave you are not alone.

[eskielover]

Interesting....I had 2 years of intense DBT group therapy & though my trauma wasnt addressed directly. Aspects of it naturally came up in conversation. When my DBT group leader became my private psychologist, the issues were easy to bring up & then worked on applying the appropriate DBT skills to handling the issues that the trauma caused.

As you get deeper into DBT I think you will be able to relate ykur experiences to what you are being taught & it will open the door for processing & discussion like i experienced

[Bill3]

How do I tell him I want my trauma to be a part of our therapy, when I've hardly mentioned it for the last 2 years? I feel like I will sound like I'm lying, or something.

In the above quote a good therapist will understand that for two years you were not ready to begin to process or discuss your trauma, but now you are.

Not to worry, this is a frequent scenario, it very often takes a long time to become ready to discuss trauma.

[Astrada]

I would definitely raise the subject. As others have stated, a good therapist will understand, and I think should give you a plan of what they think is the best way to work on any of your issues, how each relate, and in what order.

Good luck, take care.