[Jo1994]

I keep having thoughts and dream of my dad telling me he sexually abused me but I have no proof. I don't remember anything but I can't get the thought out of my head. I'm not sure what I should do about it.

[Big Mama]

Wait. Wait it out. You will find out what your brain knows when your brain knows your able to handle it. Your brain is protecting you from the truth or there is no truth to be protected from, either way all you can do is wait.

In the mean time write down everything that comes to mind in journal or notebook. Every dream or nightmare you have, every question, every memory, anything that may be useful later. That notebook will serve as a keeper of all the "puzzle pieces". Eventually you can start putting the puzzle together, as a picture becomes more complete and more clear you will have a better understanding of what really happened.

Unfortunately I have too much knowledge of how this procss works. For the longest time I could only hear my uncles laugh, 6 months later I could see his teeth, 6 months later I saw him at the store, He had that laugh and those teeth. Then the puzzle pieces were easier to put together.

The living room, the object, the carpet, the card table, all things that were just stuff in my memory eventually was put together to form a more clear picture.

* What if you found out that your dad did do something? How would that change things, would you really want to know? Are you better off not knowing since the past cant be changed? Before you push your mind for answers you need to think about these things. Once you remember something you can't un remember it. If you remember it, then you have to face it, deal with it, and live with it. That memory never goes away the 2nd time around.

I did nurofeedback and it went somewhat worng. It brought a repressed memory back. It took me 6 months of T to work threw it. It was DEFINIATELY a memory that was far better off locked away in my brain and kept from me. But now that I know, it can easily torture me and rear it's ugly head. So be careful what you wish for.

Good luck with this. If you have any questions you would like to ask or anything you need to talk about on a more personal level feel free to contact me by PM.

[Jo1994]

Thank you, I will think about if I am ready to know or not. But it feels like I need to know.