Disturbing dream

Reposting:

Hello everyone, I am not sure if this is the right place to discuss this but believe I am experiencing PTSD from childhood sexual trauma that is barely surfacing. I would like to share a disturbing dream I had...I'm trying to look at it with a curious mind and make sense of it so I welcome any opinions or advice...Thank you in advance...

My dream was about my dad, who has passed away for 7 years now. He died of cirrosis of the liver when I was 14. I dreamed that my dad was still alive, but we couldn't find him for some reason. Like he was just lost or something, we were all worried so we searched for him for several weeks. All of the sudden my partner tells me my dad is probably in a certain room in the house. I open the door and my dad is there, laying on the floor...there is trash and clutter all over and he is laying in fluids, I'm not sure what kind. He has a shirt on but no pants and he is naked. Then my husband doesn't explicitely say this, but he alludes to him and my dad having sex, that is why my dad was laying on the floor...?

I'm so confused why I would have such dreams, this is not the first dream like this. I've had several dreams about family or loved ones that are similar and have a weird sexual nature. Its very disturbing to me that I have these unconcious thoughts about my family, does anyone know any techniques that might help?

Dear Nowlosingsanity,

That sounds like such a scary and distressing dream. Sadly I have no knowledge, experience or insight into dream interpretation. Hopefully those here with similar dreams or knowledge about the meaning of dreams will see your post and respond to it with something helpful. My deepest apologies for not being able to be helpful to you in this matter!

Sincerely yours, Yao Wen

Hi, I am interested in dreams too and do dreamwork with my therapist. He says the people in the dream are parts of you, and the dream is not there to trick or scare us, but is trying to convey a message to us as best it can.

I also have Ptsd from CSA, and the dreams can be awful. It helps to really write them all down, maybe make some art about them? Nakedness and sex in dreams could represent feeling vulnerable and being connected/wanting connection.

Not sure if this helps at all, but dreams are so personal and different to everyone. I love looking at them though.

I have had all kind of strange dreams, maybe even worse than what you have described. I have mixed feelings about dreams trying to "convey" subconscious message. Some cases it may be true, but I've seen completely random scenarios with strangers or even things I'd never do in real life. I'd say please focus on your real life....there's more to progress in healing there. If this is not a satisfactory response, can I ask you, why are you trying to find a deeper meaning in this dream?

Hi @cluelessgal,
I appreciate your response, thank you for your honesty. It definitely helps to hear that others have weird disturbing dreams. I am also on the fence about whether or not dreams are worth analyzing... I think perhaps sometimes my dreams are a more accurate representation of my emotions, as I struggle to recognize my feelings in the moment and I can often push them away and do not allow myself to be sad, angry, etc...I've also had very random dreams and dreams that don't make any sense or don't connect with me at all. I have recently been having more nightmares and I know that is because I have been stressed, so that's something I'm trying to work on. Either way, I agree the best thing is to focus on real life.

Hi @MissUdy,

What you're saying makes a lot of sense and I relate with it a lot. I'm so sorry you had to go through the same thing as a child.

I did feel a little better when I wrote my dream down, but I feel like making my dream into art, at least in terms of drawing, painting, etc. would be more painful and frightening for me, like I would be reliving it again. Although, I enjoy writing poems when I am experiencing really strong emotions, so I think I will try that out and see if it helps me feel better about my nightmares. Thank you for the suggestion!

I connect to what you say about nakedness and sex representing vulnerability and connection. I definitely struggle with those areas of life. I am trying to work on keeping my stress down and regulating my emotions, but I also have curiosity about certain dreams and why they are presented in such ways. It helps me move on if I can make some sense of a nightmare, sometimes my dreams don't have any clear theme, but it is fascinating how spot on they can be.

I believe that anyone who is invested in self-growth needs to pay attention to some symbols, memories, etc. in some dreams. Many times, our unconscious minds provide us with important information.

I'm assuming you're in therapy? I hope you've discussed (or will discuss) your dream with your T. I think it holds important information for you. It's packed with pretty intense symbolism.