FAQ/Help |
Calendar |
Search |
Member
shoez
has no updates.
Member Since: Mar 2010
Location: Searching for compassion
Posts: 392
167 hugs
given |
#1
There comes a point where I look back and I see surviving poverty, all the major forms of abuse, and even both parents' abandonment and it doesn't totally shake me at all.
What does shake me? There was a lot of time wasted being abused and surviving abuse. I somehow did end up going to school, graduate school and all those things... but I did it by the skin of my teeth. I can talk about those things here on this forum and you guys can pat me on the back saying I'm so brave and awesome... yet you know what? I feel like a fake. My resume is somewhat bare, I had to take odd jobs and muster up any full time job I could find to teach me mediocre skills so I can not be homeless.... Now I want to move on and move up in my career...but honestly the biggest skill I have? Survival skills.... Sometimes I feel so old like I've done so much but for my career path. It looks like I've done nothing. A friend of mine noticed I made some basic mistakes on something and was surprised because he said "wow with all your schooling I would have thought you would know this"... its little holes from the times I faked it and somehow passed, those late nights I wrote really good papers but had no idea how. I've always had to make it by the skin of my teeth so I'm jack of all trades master of none.... Now I have time and I don't know what to say I can do.... It seems I just know how to survive __________________ |
Reply With Quote |
okstrawberry
|