Abused By Multiple Men

My former step-father whom my mother married when I was a small child was extremely abusive to both of us. Which included; mental, physical, sexual and financial abuse.

They got separated when I was in my mid-teens, but later got back together before they split for good.

I have also been sexually assaulted by other men at different times including by someone I was in a complicated relationship with. There was also physical abuse. I still have a protection order against the man I was in a relationship with and I had one against my former step-father but let it expire.

Sometimes I feel like there is something wrong with me because I have been abused by multiple men. My step-father and one time my mother when she was angry said that I could get any man to hit me. And sometimes I still feel like that.

I also feel bad because I allowed some limited sexual things to happen with the man I was in a relationship with. Because of this the police detective I spoke to didn't think that he did anything wrong even if what I was saying was true.

I have extreme PTSD among other mental problems.

I really need some support. Thank You

How terrible that those things happened to you! And heartbreaking too! Wish I knew what to say that would help.

I too am very sorry these things happened to you, especially your mom’s response. It’s all really heartbreaking. I share some of your experiences, and I realize it continues to affect me in different ways, but also that we can create a truly meaningful life, also in many ways. I hope you continue your healing journey, honor who you are, and that you find new ways to bring your gifts into the world. Sending healing thoughts and prayers. 🌈💛🙏

I am so sorry about all that happened to you. Have you considered therapy?

I am in therapy. I'm going to bring this up during our appointment Wednesday. It's still over the phone due to COVID. I think in person is better but over the phone is better than nothing and I understand the reasons why it's over the phone.

I'm so sorry these things happened to you. And especially the mother's response.

I would like to add that my mother does love me very much. I'm sure if I reminded her that she said that she'd feel bad. But it still affects me.

This is a heinous brutality shown by your step-dad. You are a very strong young lady to discuss this here. I’d suggest you talk to some counsellor in person and discuss this matter in detail.

Thanks for this post. It is very brave to discuss these things. I grew up with an abusive sister and went through patterns of abusive relationships. I also thought that there was something wrong with me as I was attracting abusive people. I think those of us who were victims of abuse sometimes don’t see the difference between a healthy relationship and an abusive one until it is too late and the pattern continues. Remember that you are not at fault. It is them. I am glad you are starting therapy. Therapy has helped me to identify an abusive person and allowed me to set certain boundaries.