Aggressive men

I just do not see how you put up with these men. Seems the bad ones hear the words "do me" when I am saying "I am not interested, I am a lesbian". That is when I call them a pig or a jerk and just walk off. Seeing the bad ones for what they really are is very liberating.

Great post.

Kinda new here. Happy to read informative posts.

Well, he's B-A-C-K! Ran into him a couple of days ago, with him having the nerve to say hi as if we ARE friends. Ignoring him didn't help, as he still made it a point to come by again on his way out, and say, "You take care". Made my stomach turn even more, as I already felt sick from an oncoming cold or flu.

After telling him to get lost a year ago, it's like that didn't happen.

Oi, some people seem to have 6 foot wide concrete walls for skulls... Nothing short of a wrecking balls seems to get through...

Good luck!

I just found this post. I'm so sorry this is happening again. Could you maybe discuss it with the library staff (hopefully he's not harassing anyone else but there could be another report). All else fails threaten a restraining order. From what you've said he sounds like he could potentially be a danger. Remember not to walk to your car/bus by yourself.

Bumping up this thread cause this man is still trying to contact me, though I've been lucky (knock on wood!) that I haven't actually run into him in person in over 2 years!

But a few months ago, I got an e-mail apparently directly from Facebook, with the subject line showing it as an invitation to join from him. (I had blocked his regular e-mails from Yahoo). I deleted that.

Then, a few weeks ago, I got one from LinkedIn, with an invitation to join. It looked like it came from him, not LinkedIn. He must be using multiple 3-mails or aliases to keep sending me mail. I've added some new filters to my e-mail, hoping that will block all of the messages from him.

He's in the neighborhood, so in theory, I could run into him anywhere.

Has this happened to anyone? What did you do? Is there enough for a restraining order? Geez, I get all the perverts or ***holes.

Wow, he's been pursuing you for three years now? I have no advice, but that sucks.

Yeah see this is why i don't give people i don't know that well my details - all i can really suggest is you ask him to stop contacting you and redirect his messages to your spam folder. If he gets threatening contact the police and let them handle it. Hope this gets resolved swiftly, all the best.

*EDIT* sorry i didn't realise this wasn't a new situation - again i would just make sure that none of his messages reach you and sadly theres nothing you can really do about living near him other than move which is something i hope you don't have to resort too. Im not sure whether you can apply for a restraining order so all i can really suggest is that you speak to your local police office and see what they advise. Again, hope you manage to get this resolved soon.

Most states have stalker laws if it gets really bad. I would keep a record and file his emails, just in case. It is important to take precautions. The fact that he is still bothering you after three years suggests that he is a problem. You can get a restraining order as well if he threatens you in any way. I am not saying any of this is necessary but you should be prudent and keep aware that there are legal things that you can do if you need to.

I am so sorry this happening. It sounds like you are doing all that you can to block the attempts via internet. As JLarissaDragon mentions, keep records of all contact in the interim, do check into the stalker laws in your area to help you stay safe, and what is required for restraining orders in your state so you know what your options are, especially if he contacts you in person. Stay safe first and foremost.

Nonightowl, I doubt it would have any effect on this guy, but how about sending him a letter via certified mail telling him you do not want ANY furthern contact with him? Might not stop him, but might help your case if you have to apply for a restraining order.

I know that this may not be received well but is it at all possible that you are blowing some of this out of proportion? Just asking and posing these possibilities.

When he saw you and spoke, it is possible that he simply did not wish to appear rude by not speaking. And because that put you on alert and you were watching for him to leave, he again felt he needed to speak because you were obviously aware of him.

The Facebook and Linkedin request could, again I say could, have simply been down by allowing them to access his contacts list and send request to everyone in it. He may not really be stalking you and wouldn't you feel like a total fool to request a restraining order for someone who has really not been stalking you, and maybe, just maybe, has totally moved on with his life.

i had this problem. i have a bf and wanted friends of any gender but i had horrible with guys who felt i should "give up my bf for them" yet they told me bluntly how unattractive i am and how they were using me as a backup buddy boy did i do the same thing in return!

they became stalkers and without my bf's help i took care of it myself! i have a bf when did i say i wanted a wide range of other boyfriends? they didn't wanna just friends and i thought hey maybe i could do some guy things to try a new avenue for myself well i was wrong. i was able to do some of that with my bf the only one i trust!

i knew girls who had guy friends and things seem to be fine as long as everybody knew their boundaries. i told these guys what i will not do or tolerate and of they didnt like it move on. it became a huge battle field telling me who the hell do u think u r? your nothing but a *****, stuck up, etc a whole slue of name calling under the sun!

everything i said and pointed out about them was true and caught them in lying and stepping over boundaries. they said you women and your damn boundaries i said that is why you men always end up going to either prison or jail when you overstep women's boundaries. i made it clear i see nothing in you as a potential bf oh wait i am unattractive so what's it to you right?

i hate when these fools dont take the hint i had to block all of them online. i would rather have gay men for friends they are fun to be around and i wont have to worry about them hitting on me or trying to get me in bed! i love having female friends my sisterhood but never again will i have a str8 guy as a friend i dont know what goes on in that screwed head of theirs!

Have to be careful these days u were smart no last name so couldn't look phone number or fb even up no number for u. And not your man email that's playing it smart glad u did to many obsessed people out there

well you NEVER have to give someone you just met-male or female-your contact info.no matter how much you feel you need a friend;