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Junior Member
Member Since May 2012
Posts: 9
12 |
#1
I dont think i have ever had a orgasm i think i get one when i masturbate but its not like how people describe it its ok maybe im just over thinking about it but my fiance worries about it cause he thinks cant give me one cause hes not good enough he is amazing so i always tell him he does and i love him some much and i really want to experience one for the both of us
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A lonely Loner
Member Since Oct 2008
Location: Away from Polaris
Posts: 3,236
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#2
I think if you lied to your fiance its not gonna help , i think you both should talk about it and how you want to be touch , if you always lied about it you will never experience it
__________________ As long as people aren't asking me if i'm all right, i am alright. |
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Elder
Member Since Oct 2010
Location: Michigan
Posts: 6,543
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#3
Maybe you're thinking/worrying about it too much during the act. Try not to think about it and just enjoy -- hopefully it will just happen if you don't obsess about it. And don't be afraid to tell him what you want. If you need him to touch you in a certain place, tell him! Or change positions -- that might help too. Good luck!
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Junior Member
Member Since May 2012
Posts: 9
12 |
#4
thanks i will try talking to him about it
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Member
Member Since Sep 2011
Posts: 21
13 |
#5
I don't know. For me, orgasms are normally "just ok". I wasn't even aware what I was experiencing was an orgasm for a few years after learning about masturbation. It certainly isn't like the "dirty" scenes in romance novels, lol. I have a weird thing where I orgasm from stress or heightened emotions, though. So maybe I am desensitized. But honestly, orgasm doesn't have to be the focus of every sexual encounter. Sometimes I feel that taking the focus off myself and my orgasm, and focusing on his pleasure, and the experience of touching him, makes my orgasms better. That could just be me though....everything is more enjoyable when I'm distracted from myself.....
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Odee
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Poohbah
Member Since Dec 2004
Location: NM
Posts: 1,455
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#6
I have a difficult time achieving orgasm as well, even if I'm doing it myself. I know what feels good and what works and it still usually takes over an hour, and it's nowhere near as good as movies portray it. It's taken years and lots of doc visits for my husband to realize it's nothing he does wrong.
__________________ God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. |
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Junior Member
Member Since May 2012
Posts: 9
12 |
#7
thanks everyone for the great advice
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New Member
Member Since Jun 2012
Posts: 3
12 |
#8
I think every woman is different. I didnt know I was having one till my husband pointed out to me. But try not to think bout during the act and try different positions.
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Grand Member
Member Since Jun 2012
Location: Ohio
Posts: 786
12 476 hugs
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#9
I have never found orgasms to be all that great. I've never gotten off during sex, though I am perfectly capable of reaching an orgasm within minutes on my own. There is nothing earth shattering about it -- no convulsing, moaning, or screams of delight! Lol! I mean, really, if this is what orgasm was like, how would we ever do it on our own without being caught?
My boyfriend asks me to find ways to get off during sex even after I explain to him that sex, to me, is more about doing things that feel nice instead of achieving some end goal. He thinks this is weird and says he doesn't understand that mentality, but we both agree it has to be a guy/girl thing. According to my boyfriend, it's not sex guys crave, it's the 'relief' afterwards. However, I am very happy that my boyfriend has told me that he hates the 'fake moaning' women make to please their partners. He tells me he knows this is fake, because it's the exact same noise women make in porn when giving guys head. Thank god I found a boy who doesn't think women find pleasing dudes orgasmic. Hahaha. So don't blame yourself, there is nothing wrong with you. I suspect a good portion of women find themselves in our situation. Think about the stereotype that women always want their men to last longer -- It's because we're in it for the pleasure of doing it but men are built to just get it done. I think it's a male-centric view to perceive orgasm as essential for sexual pleasure/satisfaction. |
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Junior Member
Member Since May 2012
Posts: 9
12 |
#10
yeah i think your right
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Member
Member Since Feb 2012
Location: Midgard
Posts: 60
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#11
You know a fake orgasm is better than no orgasm at all. If you want to fill his ego and make him stay you could lie to him.
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