[aleej28]

I've never been the type of girl to think I'm not enough or I'm not good enough for my boyfriend...but I can't stop thinking this way since I started dating one of my best friends a few months ago. He's been a very close friend for years so I've met his past girlfriends, I know his type, hell he dated one of my really good friends a couple years ago and she was the beautiful cheerleader when we were in high school with the corny-teen-comedy sorority girl type face and body....someone who gets a hundred likes for each dumb selfie she posts (she broke up with him via text after 3 months so we're not that close anymore). Anyway, I'm not that type of girl, at all, and all 5 girls he's been involved with in some way (mostly just dating, he's only been intimate with a couple people including me) fit that hot blonde stereotype and I'm just the average looking friend. It's really starting to bother me...I know I'll get the "but he likes you for you" posts but that doesn't really help, you know? We've always had fun together as friends and we still do, it's just different...and it feels like I don't have much time left and I wanna break it off before I get seriously hurt and damage our friendship. I've been driving myself crazy for months making sure I always look and certain way to come close to these other girls and I can't and I'm so tired of stressing about it. I miss not caring.

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Congratulations...He's matured.

You are now dating a man.

[marmaduke]

Stop trying too hard, be yourself. If he loves you he will stay, if he goes, he goes. Better now than later.
I think he will stay.

[Jan1212]

Well it seems like it is an issue with how you perceive things you're comparing yourself to other girls and tyring to be like them to feel accepted by your bf.

The saying "he likes you for you" means he liked you enough to want to be your BF; if he breaks up with you because "you are not the hot blonde stereotype" means he wasn't meant to be your BF be yourself and let things happen. Why would you put a person through a relationship by pretending to be someone other than who you are? It may not be fair to him because he may feel is in a relationship someone different than what he had thought

It's really not about "not caring" it's about accepting you for who you are, and you're being critical about something you are not... I understand it's tough, I went through this I'm a lot older now and still feel self conscious

[wife22]

Be yourself! first of all it is taxing and stressful to be someone else,second -if you continue changing and adjusting to certain standards,even if you are not stressed by that,you will loose your true identity eventually...And trust me,no man wants to be with a woman ,who forgot her identity,it is no fun for them,no matter how much they like certain image,they will need mental stimulation to keep the interest in you.And as posts above mentioned,he did mature,if he likes you -he'll stay,if not-no matter how much you resemble his old gf-s,he'll leave
REspect and love yourself,be yourself and good luck

[healingme4me]

What do you mean, you feel like you don't have much time left?

If you are friends and get Along, time limits???

There's time limits on working relationships? Does not time only run out, when the relationship ceases to function?
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[hamster-bamster]

I personally think that redheads are the funnest/sexiest, both because they are so damn rare and because they are fiery. On your pic you look like that kind of a fiery redhead, and not an average Jane.

[hamster-bamster]

PS. And you have a blonde kitty. A redhead with a blonde cat - nothing can top that.

[aleej28]

I felt so silly and embarrassed for posting this when I was having an episode but I'm very happy none of the responses were attacking or mean. You all were right and I just need to be myself. It's hard to not compare myself to those girls but I can't change and don't really want to.

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HUGE hug for not wanting to change....You are amazing just the way you are.....