Having a hard time making female friends, can anyone relate?

True they won't be minors forever he has 4 kids 16 and under. I don't make exceptions, I rarely do, but how many people made exceptions for me? What's good for the goose is good for the gander. I make **** absolutely clear minor kids we will never be the white picket fence I am childfree for a reason either be like me or have grown kids that's it. I won't help raise someone else's kids him and his ex wife still live in the same house so that's a flat out no lol.

I don't mind a new friend or fwbs it's up to him to be fwbs.

I'm child free too. I can understand how you feel. I hope that things work out for you and that guy.

I've always had this problem. I'm not sure how much of it is really about gender, though, because I'm very different from most of the people around me, period. think it's particularly difficult with women because of the games women are taught to play, and the dynamics that arise naturally due to their inferior status. I don't really "fit" into a social circle they can recognize, so they don't know what to do with me. I'm very stereotypically feminine in a lot of ways, so I often find men more solicitous toward me. However, it can also be flipped sometimes, with guys trying to walk all over me (I usually just walk away, as I have no reason or obligation to associate with that kind), and the women in the group being nice and trying to help me. Whoever the kind ones happen to be, I try to be kind back. I've just not had good luck with people in general, though, and I don't have a neat social pigeonhole. I think a lot of it has to do with just not having people like myself around; one of my central goals is to get to a more hospitable environment, where, hopefully, I can meet people more like myself.

I say love all trust a few! I stick to my old friends. I'm an introvert also. I confide in a male friend that I know almost 20 years. Most females I don't trust. I'm too old for he say, she say!

I'm pretty new to the forum and saw this post and thought I had signed up for this place and forgot about it. Major deja vu going on.

I haven't read through the whole thread but I've had similar problems. I'm slightly nerdy and don't go on about clothes and makeup, especially since my depression has gotten deeper. I live in the country now where being fashionable is not practical and not really possible unless I make a long drive to a major city to buy clothes, so I just dress comfortably. Location and lack of money really limits my prospects to socialize. It seems like anything that's going on nearby is church related, and I'm not religious. So I'm screwed. Even online things don't seem to stick. I open my mouth or type and the conversation dies (please don't let that happen here!).

My aunt once said I have an interesting (her words) sense of humor, and the way it was said makes me think that I'm seen as odd. I honestly don't think I'm that weird, but I don't really know what's considered "normal" thinking anymore. It was years ago, but I think at the time all I mentioned was Harry Potter or something? I don't remember exactly.

My sort of dream is going to the West coast, somewhere like Seattle or Portland where legend has it weirdos like me congregate, but I'm half afraid I won't be eccentric enough and it will make things worse. I just don't know.

The only female friends that I have (and there are very few of them) are single with no children. The other women that I know can't tear themselves away from their husbands and children long enough to meet for a cup of coffee. I understand that raising children takes a lot of work, but I also think that people make time for things that are important enough to them. I feel sad that my friendship isn't important. I'm there for these women when they need to talk and vent, but they can't reciprocate. Friendship is supposed to be a two way street. I have been thinking of doing those meetups in the hopes of meeting people who know how to balance their lives. I hate being discarded when the hubby and kids come along.

I agree. It's interesting how the single dads can go hang with their boys, but it seems these moms, a good number of them, still holding onto the fathers of their kids and can't live a life outside of a home. That's why I don't hang with the moms too much drama (only if they have grown kids), this is why I like the single dads they are more chill and relax.

I have male friends with kids and they seem to know how to carve out time to meet up at the bookstore or go to lunch. A couple of these guys were doing the "Mr. Mom" thing, so it's not as if their wives were staying home with the kids while their husbands went gallivanting around. Even the women I know with kids old enough to stay at home by themselves can't seem to find the time. Unless there is a wedding or a baby shower, or some other event where you're expected to bring gifts. When I bought my house on my own 3 1/2 years ago, I didn't get so much as a "Congratulations!". Yet I am supposed to jump for joy and run and buy gifts from someone going on their third marriage. Or buy something for a kids' party. It's all take and no give with some of these women.

I saw a Mr. Mom the other day thought it was cute. It's true seen that happen these types of women can't make the time like you said but can make time setting up parties, cakes, celebrating xyz, etc. Congratulating someone on their 3rd marriage, I'd be like are you serious marriage number 3?! You just need to be common law and that's it!

I just turned 30 two days ago, it's hard at my age to make friends with women too many kids. I have seen those younger than me with multiple kids like ****! I have been seeing more Mr. Mom's lately and think it's cute; it's attracting me for some reason but would never be in a long term relationship with a single dad maybe short term/casual that's it. Single parents seem to be attracted to me for some odd reason, but it will never be the white picket fence for us not my cup of tea.

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Why don't you trust most females? Some can't be trusted, that's for sure, but some can be trusted. I have the opposite issue. I have a hard time trusting most men. I think that most men can't be friends with women IMHO. Especially when they're single and attracted to you.

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Wow, those women are obviously self absorbed users! I'd have nothing to do with women like them at all if I were you!

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Hi, welcome! The people that I have "talked" to on here seem nice, and most people aren't to judgmental it seems like. Sorry to hear about what you're going through- Although I'm a girly girl most of the time, I can relate to most of what you said except for not having that many options such as only being able to drive far away and going to church to make friends.

Although I live in a fairly big city, it's still tough to meet women who aren't all about their kids and work. I'm a bit different too. I think that puts some people off. I don't have kids, so it's a lot harder for me to relate to women with kids, and maybe vice versa for them.

Have you tried a meetup.com group yet? It's free to join. I find that it helps to talk to other people about common interests and to take things slow at first. If they don't seem to respond that well to your sense of humour or whatever, then maybe that's your cue to maybe revaluate wether or not they might not be friend material. You can still talk to them if you like, but I would not waste to much time in trying to get people to like me once I can see that we don't really share the same values or click that well.

I've made that mistake to often, and it seems like when you try to hard to make friends with others, it makes them not want to be around you. I'm not saying that's what you're doing as I don't know you, but that's been my own personal experience. Also, a lot of Internet friendships tend to come and go, that's normal. People don't tend to take Internet friendships that seriously at times.

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I know how you feel! I've been there to many times! In my case though, it's usually the single women who have grown kids, or no kids who I tend to clash with the most. It seems like once they get a b.f, they become a lot more distant. Even if that guy treats them badly, they'll hang onto the relationship for dear life! It's so pathetic!

Then once they need to complain about something, or they end up getting dumped, you hear from them again. But it seems like all they want to do is whine about their constant drama, and use their female friends to fill that void in their lives for when they have no b.f to go out and do fun things with.

Those women suck! Ugh! Once I can see that a woman is a flip flopper and a user like that who'll only use their g.f's to avoid being bored, alone, or whatever next time, I'll just stop talking to them period. They'll never change. Trust me on that! Any woman who'll dump their friends for a guy is NOT worth being friends with period!

That is so true sounds like those women miss high school it all boils down to very poor role modeling they saw from their mothers/sisters/aunts and how they choose their friends/boyfriends/husbands. I've had issues with women who ***** at me for not wanting kids it's like get over it! These types of women I see have zero self worth and can't seem to fill the void of important things/people in their lives just classless **** to keep them occupied.

The last time I had a group of girlfriends was like, middle school. maybe high school. I'm 25 now. I would spend more times with guys instead but I don't have the skills to talk to them. I'm stupid around boys. and not in that bubbly stupid way. I mean, the oh God they are talking to me what do i say??? CLAM UP!! SAY SOMETHING STUPID!! way. It's so embarrassing.

I hear you have a husband, shy. I don't know if he's any good to you but i wonder how women do it?? I feel very lost around people. If i could do it, I'd just be a hermit.

I think it's just called life. I've had many friends do that to me.

As women we need to learn to prioritize our romantic relationships and friendships. I've had past female friends who felt the man was put first over the friendship but told me to get over it. Funny they had such drama with these boyfriends constant *****ing yet always going from one boyfriend to another but I'm the jealous one. I always tell those women with these boyfriends that must be some **** to drop me constantly.

I'd love to try a meetup. But this part of the US is a barren desert for that it seems I started looking to that when I started learning programming, because people say you network and get jobs the best at those meetings. But that doesn't seem to work if you live in a little town, and the city closest to you isn't all that techy. I ask if there's anything else I can do and the people blank out and kinda go "sucks to be you" an that's it.

I can't even find a social club type of thing just take my mind off of things and maybe have a reason to go out and eat with someone or something.

I did find a webpage for a swingers club. Woot woot.

This place is a constant slap in the face.

I had some hope for this upcoming year, as I thought that I was starting to rebuild some old friendships and cultivate new ones. Maybe not.

There's a girl in my support group that I befriended because we had similar tastes in comedy. My goal was to find people to spend some time with over a cup of coffe or a meal. Hers was apparently to find a place to stay because she doesn't like her current living situation. When she asked me if she could stay with me and I told her no, I haven't heard from her since.

There's a guy that re-friended me on Facebook because he had a falling out with his wife and he was getting back in touch with all of the people that she didn't want him talking to. Like me, he has bipolar, and we were talking about going to group together. Now he decided to get back together with his wife and it's like he fell off the face of the earth again.

I'm beginning to think that there are lots of people out there that just don't know how to be a friend to anyone. I feel sorry for them in a way. Kids grow up and leave the house and a spouse can leave or die. Then what do these people have left?

I have the same problem my fiance hates that I have more male friends then female friends. I just don't trust females at all. I have had a few female friends and my best friend is female. I have tried to make more female friends the last couple of years but it seems the last few female friends I had tried to sleep with my fiance. While he had no interest in them they still to sleep with him. I guess I just have bad judgement on who I make friends with. I personally see nothing wrong with people of different genders being friends but some people do.

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I know, but it still sucks. Can't women have a b.f and friends too? Women like that make no sense to me at all.

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Sorry to hear about that lady. It sounds like she was just looking for a place to stay and that she had no intention of being your friend. People like that suck. It's good that you didn't let her use you. That guy sounds like he has to much drama going on. He kind of sounds like some of my former female friends. They tend to disappear once they get a b.f, ugh!

There are lots of people out there who are selfish. Some people will use you and then leave you once they don't need you anymore. Then they move on tho their next victim. Those peole aren't looking for real friends. You're right about what you said. What will happen to those people once their kids grow up and their spouse either leaves them or dies before them? I guess that they don't really think of stuff like that.

I'd like to believe that there are still some good honest people out there who would make good friends. They seem so hard to find though. It's almost like looking for a needle in a haystack at times!

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Wow, no wonder why you have trust issues with femaies! You need to notice the little red flags when you meet a new person. If another female is the type who sleeps around, is easy, is always trying to flirt with guys, dress in skimpy clothing around your b.f, etc....then ditch that person and find other women who aren't like that.

At least you can trust your fiance! I don't trust most men as I think that they have a harder time controlling their sexual desires. The last two male friends that I had were both single and they could not take no for an answer even though they knew that I wasn't interested in them and that I'm married. So I had to end my friendship with them.

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Wow, that sucks! Swingers club? LOL! Here is a site that lists a few ways that you can meet other women for friendship. SocialJane might work for you.

Websites That Help You Meet Friends

Or you could move if that is possible.