something i just thought about

a long, long time ago a member brought up the idea for a forum for people who might be bi-sexual and also one for bi-racial people. i supported her and after reading a thread here , which i've contributed to, i feel that if i were a lesbian or bi-sexual, i might not have much to contribute to it.....

people got into an uproar over it and she left. and i really, really regretted her leaving. she was a dear person.

i wish that we could have those forums. i'm bi-racial and have had some really difficult times in my life. and i feel that it would be very supportive for bi-sexial/gay posters to have a forum for themselves.

now..........that i've come "out" in support of equal forum support, could we discuss it without getting our collective panties in a wad? ''

1. no one here HAS to read EVERY forum. i don't. and i don't care how many forums we have here or what they pertain to, as long as it's legal.

2. i really hope that if you don't agree with having this discussion in a calm manner that you'll go on to a forum of your choice and perhaps add some loving support to someone there.

3. i'm going to bed...... had a hard day today. apologize for bringing this up and then leaving.

Hi fayerody

I'm not lesbian or bisexual. I support you on having a gay and/or lesbian forum as well as a biracial forum.

And just like on TV....if you don't like what you are seeing or hearing.....turn the channel! Who knows maybe us heterosexual and others that aren't biracial....could learn some new things and have an understanding and not so much fear aka anger against the unknown.

Until you've walked a mile in their shoes......I'd wear no panties to avoid getting them into a "collective wad"!

((((((((((((((((((((fayerody))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

I for one would SUPPORT any FORUM that can HELP another PERSON..... to Heal & Cope.

And I would love to have a bi-racial forum, for I personally have 2 nephews & 3 nieces (from two diff reunions/ couples) that are bi-racial and some times it just helps to be able talk about the negative reactions one receives from other people when you are made to hurt for your loved ones - due to ugly stares and uncalled for comments.

FYI & BTW - if we all really set down and thought about it for a moment - we are all Bi-Racial..... for most of our ancestors came from over to seas to start with and most of them were from inter-racial marriages, and some even from with in their own family line.

LoVe,
Rhapsody -

I agree, I think that if we can create a safe place for people to come and talk about how they are feeling concerning these issues, and it can help them ... why not! I am totally supportive of this and think its a great idea.

Jacqueline

I agree.

It might open a door to the ones who are silent.

I guess I feel sad that people would think that they couldn't talk about issues to do with bisexuality, biraciatiality, gender etc on the boards that are currently offered.

i mean, i guess i have the worry of 'where does it all stop?' and i'll admit i also have the worry of why people need to be grappling with the exact same issue in order for their support / advice to mean something.

i'm a little wary of different boards for different genders even. why? because i'd like to understand guys better. i'm not sure how i would be welcomed to the guys board (as a girl) however. in the presence of such worries... i'll admit that i'm not sure how such boards are helping the issue as opposed to ampifying it.

for example... there are things i would like to know about guys.

but... how welcome will i be (as a girl) posting a question to the guys forum? not well received is my bet... but maybe i'm being unfair???

?

I think it's a good idea. I am supportive and would welcome anyone who is seeking help.

snow

I would think you could go to the men's boards and ask opinions. Same here if a guy wanted a female opinion. Maybe I am wrong there but it wouldn't be the first time either lol. I say go post there and ask the guys for opinions and see what happens.

Alex said: i mean, i guess i have the worry of 'where does it all stop?' and i'll admit i also have the worry of why people need to be grappling with the exact same issue in order for their support / advice to mean something.

would you just have one big forum for all of us? depression, anxiety, DID, etc.? i would never presume to understand everything about every disorder and wouldn't feel that i could offer something to everyone. so, i feel that we have to have different forums for different issues.

i don't have to be "grappling" with a problem to enjoy talking to a photographer more than, say, a sculptor.......i know nothing about bronze and i sure know about a lot about darkroom work...

if you aren't bi-racial and finding yourself caught between two worlds, then i can see how you wouldn't understand the specific problems it can cause. i can't live completely comfortable in either world of my races and i imagine there are others here that feel as i do. someone else might be able to help me understand my feelings when i feel insulted or rejected due to being bi-racial.

i'm more comfortable with the race that i least resemble and have been misunderstood thousands (it seems) of times by caucasians....and that hurts. and there's a world of ignorance out there concerning race anyway.....

as for gay/bisexual members, to me it would be a no-brainer. i haven't gone through 1/10th the crap that my gay friends have to go through on a daily basis. if it were happening to me, i'd love a safe place to discuss my feelings and every day issues.

thank you all for generously responding. it shows that PC has some open-hearted and big-hearted people here......xoxoxo pat

Nice post up there Pilatus, very well said. And fayerod, yes, thank you, thank you.

I am a lesbian and although I agree with Alex as to what should be happening in the world, the sad reality is that I often feel more liken to open up completely on certain issues when I know someone who lives a similar life circumstance, can offer advice on issues they've faced with their circumstances... It's not to say I'm afraid to share with everyone else (after all I'm PROUD) but it was a long road to get here and honestly, I still stumble. The truth is, you don't feel different until there's someone there to point it ourt And, there will always be someone there.

But overall, I think we all like to feel "kinship" with peers in the same "orientation". After all, I may learn about what life is like being biracial/bi-sexual/transgendered/or whatever forum we enact, I may find I have more in common than I thought with other groups or I may see our differences and understand people better. This could work two-fold. Can I speak on what it's like to BE biracial? No. I can't offer life experience or advice to someone struggling there, but I could follow their posts and perhaps learn what life is like in another's shoes.......

Anyway, I'm all for it......

I agree and support this idea!

The more inclusive, here and IRL, the better, IMO.

I also agree. I think it would be an informative and caring place that we could come to. Thanks, Pat, for thinking of it and bringing it up.

Mary Alice

I think one of the issues early on with this type of forum is that PC was a board of "disorders" mainly, and no one wanted the forum to be considered thus. Now that there are many other forums here, that wouldn't apply.

But one of the arguments against a special forum for this is that such posts could be put into relationship's forum. However, I think this is another admin issue we should take to PM, not public.

Believe in Him or not --- GOD LOVES YOU!

Want to share your Christian faith? Click HERE

did you think that Mellors should have taken it to PM when he wanted a male forum?

why would i ask a straight guy (Doc John) if he would be interested in posting in a bi-sexual/gay/lesbian forum when the membership is who make up the forums, sky?

i know that you know that i can not do anything here without John okaying it. why would i go to him with a half-baked idea without any idea about how others felt about it? huh? i can't spend any more here now than i do.....i cut to the chase and i see that there are many who support this.

p.s. i don't know if Doc John is bi-racial but i bet he knows someone who is and is aware of the problems that we encounter. he knows me. (pat added her p.s.)

Fay......GOOD IDEA. We have forums here for just about every issue, from being new to the site to just plain being a woman. But you're right, there's no forum for homosexuality and biracial issues. And those two things themselves can cause depression and anxiety. So, maybe those people could post in depression and anxiety? True....but it is so much more helpful to post with others who truly understand you. I have depression and anxiety that comes from my MS and my alcoholism. So I post in Substance and Health Support......but we are lacking a decicated forum for folks grappeling with being homosexual, or wondering if they are......and so many young folk like to hang out here, and I know I questioned my sexuality when I was younger. I don't think its so much not feeling comfortable posting......but wanting a specific place with people who understand. I do think it's valid. Maybe you should point DocJohn to this discussion?

PS-I'm glad you brought this idea to the public forum, since we all help to "govern" this community in a way.....

The problem with a lot of forums for me is that it's like a lot of television channels, no one of them gets very many watchers. If one has an hour, for example, and there are four forums, then one can read and work for 15 minutes per forum. But that same hour over 15 forums only goes 4 minutes a forum.

I realize that one doesn't have to read every forum but adding forums adds complexity to everyone and where I had only 4 to begin with, I'm still going to "channel surf" 15 to make sure I don't miss anything "good" and since the lines aren't perfect between forums, someone is going to mention that over in forum X such and such is happening and I think people will feel left out because they don't normally read forum X and maybe even resentful because forum X is mentioned in forum Y. Like now, how about bi-sexual guys? Here we are in the women-focused support forum and they may not read this forum and/or people who don't read either of the gender forums won't have a clue that people are talking about adding a forum. It gets much harder to know where to post when things get so divided up.

You can set your view to only show the forums you frequent, so that you're not having to look at every single one. It helps a lot to narrow it down to a few forums.

i'm working on the fact that men would be included. men are gay. men are bi-racial.

thanks, Ray, for the support. i stuff my feelings about treatment i receive from being bi-racial and it causes me stress at certain times. i travel with a lot of Navajoes and you can imagine what i've been subjected to from other races AND from anglo men.....i have no one IRL to talk to about it.

i especially liked your thoughts about the younger posters who have questions about sexuality. i know that i questioned my sexuality when i was a very young teen. i think it's normal. of course, there was no one to talk to about it.....(1950s)

thanks again, xoxxo pat

I also think it would be great to have a sexuality forum. It could be perfect for those who want to specifically discuss this area of their life, no matter the orientation, and discuss this very important area of living as it applies to life. Sure we could throw a post into relationships as it applies, into health as it applies, into drug questions as it applies, into anxiety or depression as it applies. However, the good fit for discussions so specific would be great in their own forum, I think.

No matter the orientation, many have things they'd like to discuss in a frank manner with those who can relate without having to worry about a the use of an icon or warning of the content, etc. (for instance even though a discussion might deal with health, it relates to sex and maybe frankly is the only way it can be discussed)...much like we search the forums to discuss what we can now and meet in this forum, the depression forum, or any other forum of interest/need.

I think it's an important forum to have and many might feel more at ease to discuss these issues if there was a forum specifically designated.

KD