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  #1  
Old Nov 27, 2014, 12:03 AM
Anonymous37970
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I read something not too long ago that's left me disturbed. It gave more proof to a stereotype I've created when I was a kid that's progressively grown. I'd really like to have it disproved to some extent. What I read was from a woman who thought that women should get a good degree, marry a rich guy, have a kid as soon as possible, and then quit working and try to live as richly as possible while putting up with their kids who they obviously didn't like to spend time with. I read other comments from other women, who seemed very intelligent, agreeing with this... It's disturbed me so much. Do many women, intelligent even, actually like to be helpless in order to feed off others like this? Are many women this selfish? I'd never want to live off anyone else or just have kids for that purpose, and I've always wanted to support myself. I'd like to believe there can be much more purpose for a human life. Hmm...
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  #2  
Old Nov 27, 2014, 12:34 AM
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ChipperMonkey ChipperMonkey is offline
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Do you remember where you read this?

These women sound like they live sad, unfulfilled lives. Pathetic, really.

I've never had those sorts of aspirations, nor have I known anyone who thinks like that. Is this a particular segment of society?
Thanks for this!
Pikku Myy
  #3  
Old Nov 29, 2014, 09:43 AM
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Evening Evening is offline
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Well I don't want kids, don't have a degree, and have no interest in being with a guy as the last thing I want is to spend the rest of my life being second best to one the way I always was to men growing up.
So whoever wrote what you read is wrong.
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  #4  
Old Nov 29, 2014, 11:02 PM
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healingme4me healingme4me is offline
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I don't know of anyone with that particular aspiration.

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  #5  
Old Nov 30, 2014, 12:30 AM
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Petra5ed Petra5ed is offline
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I don't know of any women like that. I have a post graduate degree and work, I have a lot if female coworkers many but not all of which have kids... They all enjoy having a career.

That sounds like a male stereotype for a gold digger, I wouldn't buy into that being the norm. Nowadays women outpace men in getting college degrees and almost outpace men in terms of % employed. What few stay at home moms I know made the choice because their salary wasn't much more or was less, than the cost of daycare which can be 1k plus per child. Of those women I've seen most go back to work once their kids reach school age.
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  #6  
Old Dec 01, 2014, 05:03 AM
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mimsies mimsies is offline
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Back when I was married... I did want to stay home, but not just so I didn't have to work. I specifically WANTED to be with my son. Being a stay at home mom is definitely work. In my case it was my favorite job ever though. I have to admit though, since I studied human learning and memory in college, being a mom was also fascinating- watching him grow and develop and learn. It was like having my own long term experiment/case study!

I'll go back for my graduate degree after he heads off to college, probably.

Just to be clear, even at 15, he is still my precious sweet baby bear!
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  #7  
Old Dec 01, 2014, 06:05 PM
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JLarissaDragon JLarissaDragon is offline
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As women we would all love to have choices. I am glad that I have advanced degrees and a career, but many times I do wish I could have stayed home with her and raised her rather than having to farm her out to daycare,

I am not so sure that stay at home moms are miserable. It seems that that might be a stereotype too, After all one size does not fit all
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  #8  
Old Dec 01, 2014, 06:49 PM
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baseline baseline is offline
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Women are expected to do it all. Pressure to have a career and children all while looking gorgeous and keeping fit ! Don't forget keeping the hubby happy and satisfied!! We are set up for feeling overwhelmed and not good enough. If you are a stay home mom you are made to feel guilty because you don't work and are not interesting enough. If you have a career and have to send the kids to daycare you are a selfish career climbing *****!!! It is exhausting being a mother/wife/provider. Add taking care of aging parents to the list and wham you got superwoman on anti anxiety/antidepressants. Sorry about the rant just hitting to close to reality!!!
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  #9  
Old Dec 02, 2014, 02:31 AM
Anonymous37970
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ChipperMonkey View Post
Do you remember where you read this?

These women sound like they live sad, unfulfilled lives. Pathetic, really.

I've never had those sorts of aspirations, nor have I known anyone who thinks like that. Is this a particular segment of society?
Hmm, I guess so. I do know that I wouldn't like to live like this myself. I'd personally be miserable!

I agree that society seems to have many bad things to say about women's life choices compared to the amount of good things. I wonder if this is the same for guys? I get the impression that some old stereotypes of girls and guys still float around. I wasn't allowed or was dissuaded from following some of my own interests when growing up because "I'm a girl," and it's only caused problems for me as an adult since I have to learn all those things from the beginning.

I'm very glad not every woman thinks about wrongly taking advantage of marriage and their children for their own purposes. Phew! I can be overly-worried sometime. You all sound very sweet, actually. It's nice reading these stories.
Thanks for this!
healingme4me
  #10  
Old Dec 04, 2014, 07:45 PM
norwegianwoman norwegianwoman is offline
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I don't know of any women with those aspirations either. Do they actually exist? :P The women I know want to see the world before they get married, kiss a few "toads", get their career up to a stable level so they can afford an apartment and preferrably a car - and THEN, maybe, start thinking about a guy and kids (if they're not so lucky to meet a great guy before they're through with all that). And I don't know anyone who wants to stay at home all through the kid's childhood. I think it's healthy for kids to go kindergarten and school, learn to socialize with other people from an early age. I still miss kindergarten and I am 23! It was a wonderful time.
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