I dont know why I even try to speak

Nobody listens to me. I am getting so fed up of it now.

No matter how important or unimportant it might be what i am saying. It seems no matter what, it gets dismissed.

For months, and i mean months -i was saying what could help a situation. Time and time again it was ignored. Finally, someone else said the same as me and they were saying what a good idea it was! I was like, ive been saying this for months!

I already shut myself away from society as i struggle socially, but now i feel like shutting off from those i do have around me.
It knocks my confidence so when im in work, i feel it is pointless to suggest my ideas as i feel they will be ignored.
I am feeling quite down in the dumps lately and talking to brick walls does not help!

It is awful to feel unheard. I'm sorry you are having to deal with this.

i'm sorry nobody is listening to you, that's so frustrating and demeaning. know that we here on PC will listen to you any time any day

Uggh, I know what you mean. It's an on going joke between DH and I that if I tell FIL something he'll totally disregard it, but if my Brothrr-in-law tells him the exact same thing he will listen (then turn around and tell me). It's infuriating. Also, he talks over me and turns every conversation around to talk about his own POV.

I've just noticed lately how invalidated I feel between him, and somesometimes DH, and just people in general.

I know I used to feel that way all the time.....but I also know that when I was saying things before that I felt I wanted people to hear, I wasn't actually speaking up so they could even really hear me.....I always spoke so softly that no one would hear what I said in the first place....because of lack of confidence that what I had to way had any value in the first place & also because I heard my father talking really stupid stuff all my life growing up & I never wanted to end up sounding like him so I was afraid to speak out for fear I would make a fool out of myself the way I felt my dad made a fool out of himself even though I had valuable things to say.

I would fight on an individual basis with my parents or with my H for things that I felt needed to be heard but I would NEVER do it out with other people or in a group.....it's only been in the last 8 years, after I was 54 years old that I was able to speak up & actually have people listen to what I have to say.....it almost scared me the first time it happened & I almost forgot what I was trying to say when everyone started to listen....but my confidence has grown over the years......I just make sure that I don't talk over others & choose the right time to speak out & if I accidentally speak when someone else is saying something, it seems that the people I'm around now always come back to what I had to say......

OK...that brings up the point.....if you have people surrounding you who don't RESPECT your opinion or thoughts.....they aren't going to bother wanting to listen in the first place.....I found that to be true for me....it wasn't until I was finally surrounded by people who care & who respect me as a person that they are willing to listen to what I have to say....& that took leaving my bad marriage of 33 years.....my parents died & I moved 2100 miles away to a place where I didn't know anyone....& I started life fresh.....& it was like starting over & gave me a chance to earn the respect of those around me without the preconceived notions that existed before...but then I was married to a guy & we had no social contacts......figured out only after I had left him 7 years that all those years I was dealing with someone who had Asperger's so I understand now why communicating with him was so impossible & why we had no social life for all those years.

Also if you don't have confidence in that what you have to say is valuable & have been beaten down for years....you are being conditioned to NOT speak up & it will only get worse unless you force yourself to be heard.....take it from a 62 year old who struggled with that all my life. It's possible to break out of the pattern that's being formed but it takes work & for me it took leaving the environment I was living in because it was never healthy but I couldn't escape until I finally did.

As women I think we have an inherent need to talk and be heard. It is infuriating when we are interrupted and cut off. I am learning that my husband is wired differently and perhaps that is more true of men in general. I try to make allowances for that, but there are sometimes we just feel alone and that no one ever pays attention. I am pretty introverted and I find I just have to force myself to reach out