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Member
Member Since Mar 2012
Posts: 32
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Apr 16, 2015 at 09:09 AM
#1
I have a 5 months relationship with my boyfriend. Our sex life is amazing, we enjoy it a lot. But I've been notice that sometimes he can get an erection but can't finish. He says that is something emotional like happen to us, or just that he just want me so bad that he can't finish. He says it's not me that he loves me and I like him very much. But that happens sometimes but recently is more frequently. Is that normal? I know it is normal in woman we tend to have a lot of things in mind but in men, never heard of it. Any suggestions?
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Apr 16, 2015 at 01:44 PM
#2
As long as he is fully content with his sex life (he says he loves you and that he wants you 'so bad' - maybe he just enjoys prolonging the sex - which is great in my opinion) then I do not think there is any reason for concern, unless you are trying to conceive at the moment. Sex is about a lot more than just penetration and if it's really great sex then whether one finishes off at the end or not is not really a big deal, in my opinion. Have you considered finishing him off orally or manually, after penetration - maybe it could help? But again, unless he is discontent with it, I would not stress over the issue.
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Member
Member Since Jan 2015
Location: The Mixed States of America, 96816
Posts: 354
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Apr 16, 2015 at 01:57 PM
#3
Is he on any meds?
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Apr 16, 2015 at 02:13 PM
#4
Yes meds can affect this.
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Member
Member Since Mar 2012
Posts: 32
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Apr 22, 2015 at 10:07 AM
#5
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Member
Member Since Mar 2012
Posts: 32
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Apr 22, 2015 at 10:08 AM
#6
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New Member
Member Since Jun 2014
Location: USA
Posts: 9
10 |
Apr 30, 2015 at 01:43 PM
#7
I've had two boyfriends with this exact issue, and it's incredibly disheartening. With one, it was just that he was getting older and his testosterone was getting lower faster than the norm. He got on hormone replacement therapy and that fixed it right up. But with the other....
Well, at the risk of sounding like a drama queen, and with my sincere apologies if I am totally wrong, with my other boyfriend it turned out that he was a sex addict, and his "drug" of choice was porno. Through psychological conditioning, it turned out that he'd "trained" himself to really only finish by himself to visual-only images. Digging deeper, he had a serious issue with intimacy; he was terrified of it, so hid in porno, but longed for it at the same time, so he turned to porno as a halfway point. So.... two ends of the spectrum, I guess. Hopefully it's just the first one or something else equally innocuous! Good luck! |
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Member
Member Since Aug 2014
Location: Norge
Posts: 137
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May 05, 2015 at 07:05 PM
#8
It's normal. Especially if he has been drinking. Not just with older men either, with men in their 20s etc aswell. It can vary between not getting it up and not being able to finish. Some men struggle more with it than others and can be really sensitive about it. It's probably not you, and it has probably happened with his other sex partners aswell. Don't let it bring you down. And yes, porn addiction can lead to erectile dysfunction, you kind of "program" your brain to orgasm when watching porn and sometimes real sex (which is much messier and less... porny) does not cut it. You can ask him about this because it can be treated.
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My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.
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