Dealing with grief and distress from infertility...

So, I guess to start out...I'm 21 years old, and while I don't really have any interest in having kids for a long while (or well, adopting as the title may imply), I've been really struggling at times with the fact that I'm completely infertile (I don't even have a womb, so no possibility of even alternative treatment). While I'm happy for the people I see, and who I know, who become pregnant and have kids, its always really bittersweet for me, and at times even physically painful.

I mean I don't even know if I ever want kids, but yet I still just sometimes curl up and bawl my eyes out because of the fact that its not possible for me to ever be pregnant. Plus I just feel like overall it makes me less attractive - being yet another thing wrong with me that harms my ability to ever be loved by anyone (I've never really had anyone interested in me ever) - despite the fact that I'm a lesbian.

More often than not at least a few times a week this is on my mind, and it causes where my womb would be to just feel extremely painful, and can make me very depressed. Its just upsetting, confusing, and downright painful most of the time, and I don't understand why...I mean its not like I want to be pregnant...I just...I don't know...feel inadequate because its not even a choice or option for me?

This is a really personal issue for me, but I was hoping that I could find some ways to better cope with this. It can make me become quite a mess, and I'm just constantly reminded of it...

I feel your pain being 26 and wanting kids more than anything causes me to be depressed a lot. I can't relate to your issue mine is more not having enough money. It sucks and I hurt a lot on the inside.