Menopause, ADHD and relationship issues

Does anyone besides myself have ADHD who is in Menopause? I am currently experiencing relationship issues. I was diagnosed with ADHD at 26, after I married my husband of almost 27 years. We had a turbulent first 10 years. My husband told me that he has felt mistreated for most of the 27 years of our marriage. I have a very difficult time remembering what he is talking about but apparently, He says I was selfish and did not treat him right. My hubby is very supportive of me most of the time and he doesn't think I have paid attention to him like he has paid attention to me. I can see some of what he is saying. I often react badly to what he say's. I have a history from childhood of screaming, yelling and stomping up stairs. This behavior is still happening but not as much as it did as a kid (we don't have stairs now LOL). There is a lot of hurt that he feels and it seems the only way to solve it is to not react badly to the hurt feelings he is expressing. There is a lot of information that is not included that may shed more light on the issue but I do not have the time to include it. I want to work on myself and how I react to my husband. I am not putting any blame on anyone but myself and my husband is not the bad guy. Can any one identify or give me some pointers?