Why do some guys think it is acceptable to call women b****es and justify it?

I stumbled upon Quora (the bane of my existence), in which a guy asks if he’s right to call his girlfriend a b****, here were a couple of answers:

“well im in a relationship with my gf since 3 years. out of that 2 years were long distance.so we havent met since 1 year. we both decided to meet on a particular day, few days before her exams. i had asked for an entire day but knew that because of her exams it wasnt possible. so i expected to meet atleast for half an hour. i came the day before we were to meet from pune to my hometown(350kms on bike). it was a 5hour contiouous ride in which a almost broke my back, got sunburnt, almost met with an accident. i had to reach the previous day because we couldnt meet during her exams and i did not want her to be bothered during her exams. so the day we were to meet, she suddenly cancels which completely blows my temper. and i end up calling her a b**** when she said she didnt even have half an hour.”

“Yes you was.

Love or not eye for an eye fair after all is fair.

Act a c*** be treated as you act. Because actions speak louder than words you’re her BF not her baby sitter. No excuses.”

And then there’s the question about a woman saying if it’s justified for a boy to call her a b**** even if she was acting like one, here were the answers:

“Well, what do you expect him to call you, when you referred to yourself the same way? Double standards will cause people to lose respect for you.

Why don’t you try not being a b****, and see how that goes?”

“If you’re acting like one and he calls you on it, sure.

Just like if he was acting like an arsehole and you called him on that, it would be fine.”

“Pretty much, yeah.

If you act like an asshole, then you have no right to be offended when someone calls you out on it. (hint hint Quora)

If he’s just slagging you off and calling you names for no reason, that’s different. But if you give him reason, then that’s on you, not him.”

“LOL Well it is not very polite but by your own admission you were acting like one so in these circumstances I guess you could say he is just ‘calling it like it was’ as we say in England !!

Don’t be a b****, it is not sexy lol unless he likes those kind of sex games where you are the b**** and he is the submissive?…Yes well, you know the rest !”

Then there’s Reddit, that goes on to complain that women can get away with acting s****y but apparently calling her a b**** is offensive even though they claim it’s justified because she is acting like a b**** and they’re telling it like it is.

https://www.reddit.com/r/unpopularop..._fine_and_not/

Also the audacity of claiming boyfriends have authority over their girlfriends and they shouldn’t be their “babysitter” so it’s “no excuse” NOT to call her a b**** because apparently men have every right to be misogynistic because women are asking for it.

True, there are mean women out there, even some that are mean to men. But these guys just want excuses to call women slurs just to gain their superiority and justify it by saying “she was acting like a b****/c***, so she deserved to be called one!” all while placing blame and hatred onto women for internalizing misogyny and saying “well then don’t be a b**** then and you won’t get called one, stop getting offended and hold yourself accountable”.

The sheer entitlement of it all just makes me sick. I know what you’re thinking: don’t click on those sites and stop getting offended. Keep in mind, I said “stumbled” by the beginning of the thread, and also calling someone derogatory slurs IS offensive, especially to those being targeted, so no I have a right to feel that way.

Anyways, rant over.

Guys who have that kind of attitude towards women have issues. I think that they expect women to behave a certain way & that they can’t handle any kind of conflict, disagreement, criticism or rejection.

They are rude & immature too. They expect women to be obedient, sweet & submissive at all times it seems like.

Men have to call out other men for that behaviour

I was in a meeting a few years back and a guy on our team called a woman in another department “that B”

In front of all the guys I said “Not ok. No gender specific insults allowed.”

He said, “ Then she’s an a—hole”

I said,”She is SUCh an a—hole. But if you call her a gender specific insult it’s especially derogatory and demeaning. But yeah, she’s an a—hole. Horrible person and personality.”

Gender insults say a lot about the person saying them. Men need to have that pointed out., I think.

RDM

I think a lot of guys who resort to such demeaning talk are essentially carrying the misogynistic character trait. Question them further about their opinions on women and it will all come out. These guys aren't very smart people.

Sounds like great advice. Thank you.

Men can be the B word and cock k u n t s. Just saying.

Aw, so true. Even more so in certain respects. I mean a lot men will become wild animals given the circumstances things women won't do. Terrible. And that's an insult to the animal kingdom to even call them "wild animals"!

Off topic for a bit, I find it weird how when little boys (not all) act misogynistic and exclude girls, people tend to excuse it and say “he’s just a little boy, it’s normal for him to feel that way, he’ll grow out of it”, but if little girls act the same vice versa, they’ll say “what are they even learning this stuff from? How dare they speak that way to/about my son! it makes me sad how much of this comes from parents' low expectations of boys instead of anything wrong with the little kids themselves. "oh you know how boys are!" no... I don't. please explain it to me. then explain it to your son, who's right there, who's acting like this because you and all the adults around him are perpetuating this tired-*** cliche.“

I also stumbled upon a mother who got upset about people putting gender stereotypes on boys and saying “I assure you, the girls in my sons’ classes are far, Far, FAR more miserable mean humans than any boy I’ve met so far. The backstabbing, the drama, ostracizing others randomly throughout the week, its non-stop and it’s exhausting.

Can we lay off the negative stereotypes of LITTLE CHILDREN! For God’s sakes, they are little kids.”

This is the same woman who placed gender stereotypes on girls and contradicted herself on how we shouldn’t be stereotyping children even though she did it herself, smh

Sorry if I sound like I’m trolling, just had something on my mind, lol