[kahonen]

Is anyone else here dealing with or dealt with a depressed husband? I am married to the nothing wrong with me type who rarely discussed feelings in the first place. In the last year he turned 40, had to stop smoking pot, and a couple months after that he had to put our beloved 14 year old golden retreiver to sleep due to an awful cancerous tumor. It has been a really rough year for him personally. He increasingly isolates himself and speaks to family and friends with anger in his voice. He is mean and non-interactive with anyone. His closest guy friend has also told me he acts this way even during guy time. He is the type that will refuse to seek help no matter how bad it gets. Does anyone here have any experiences with this? It is getting to the point where I feel like I am living in this house with my kids and my husband us nowhere to be found even if he is sitting in the other room. NEED HELP!

[ickydog2006]

Are you seeing a therapist or have access to one. My suggestion would be to make an appointment and tell him you would like him to come with you. Then you can talk about how you are feeling with a mediator present. Also, it may encourage him to seek help when he realizes how much this is effecting you.

[Sad In TX]

Yes, I have. Unfortunately he didn't do anything until I left him. I hope to God it won't come to that for you.
I suggest having an honest discussion with him about this. Let him know that you love him dearly, but you need him. You need his love, but he's been so distant that you've been afraid to say anything for fear of him lashing out. But tell him you love him, and say "I really want to help you but I don't know what to do so I think we should see someone together."

I think the only way to get to the point is to try to get him to see yours. You will probably have an argument about what he needs to do and whatnot, but hold your ground.
I wish you the best. I hope you guys can get the help you need.