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Tifur
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Member Since Aug 2010
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Default Sep 01, 2010 at 07:28 AM
  #1
I'm 34 years of age, I have a good degree (in an art subject) and even though it has been a good 10 years since leaving university, I haven't really got to grips with a career that had any meaning or for that matter any security.

In the UK it's common for people who do arts courses to end up doing pretty menial work. I've moved from job to job, but eventually found a role in events organising. My contract came to an end in August and I'm now looking for work, which is difficult and often very competitive.

I'm desperate to break out of the pattern that has come to dominate my life for at least the last 5 years. That is one of depression, feeling useless, not being able to feel securely rooted and I've also been living at home with my parents which makes me feel as if my life isn't my own. I was just about to move out before this job finished (I'd paid off debts and had some savings).

My situation isn't too bad right now and with this window I hope to make some decisions. There are positives. For one, I'm now physically fit and cycle long distances which brings me a lot of joy - something that was missing before. I visited friends this summer (abroad) for a holiday and really appreciated what good friendship was and what FUN in life was - a lot of friendships where I am now have been circumstantial rather than friends I'd truly made, so have been superficial and turned sour. I'm sure this is also down to now being rooted or grounded.

One aim I have would be to move out to this country. I have previous connections to that country and know it fairly well. I've decided to do a language course starting this month, but before I can do it I really need to be able to make a sustainable life here, so I can transfer those skills to a new place. Otherwise the whole thing is a fantasy. I've also managed to build up some savings so I have options about perhaps doing evening courses and trying new things.

The issue I have right now if finding work that's willing to take me on. The arts is badly paid and experience is everything and often there are better qualified people than me. Office jobs don't come to me since I'm older and the art thing usually sets alarm bells ringing about the person 'fitting in'. I can't really bear doing this sort of work anyway! Over the last few years, I've found myself getting more and more frustrated with life and work life. Although I'm more pro-active about looking after myself, finding what people and places suit me I haven't cracked either building a network of contacts to move in job wise, or the right sort of job. I've tried education again, which I left after realising it was just a repetition of the arts course I had already done.

I've had enough of going around in circles, I've had enough of feeling nothing and being passive because of depression. I want to feel joy and have meaningful relationships with people I truly like. I need to be able to operate in a networking environment, and finding ways into the job world. Unless I can crack that aspect of life, empowering myself to move country will be a no go.

Any advice to do this would be appreciated. Is career counselling a possibility? I've had counselling and meet up with him every 3-4 months to catch up but there we deal with emotional rather than practical issues.
If anyone has been in a similar situation and managed to work themselves out of it I'd like to hear your story.

Best wishes

Tifur
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madisgram
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Default Sep 11, 2010 at 12:52 PM
  #2
hi tifur, welcome to pc. you sound llike you're at a crossroads in your life. i believe you are realistic with where you are now and have some vision for your future. are there agencies in the uk to help you consider your career options? sounds like your degree is not something you wish to use in the future to have gainful employment. perhaps a change is in order and maybe some training in a new field. you are young enough to do this if you choose. there are tests to see what you are best suited for. have you pursued this at all? check it out and i wish you the best. you can broaden your horizons.

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Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle.
The world you desired can be won. It exists, it is real, it is possible, it is yours..~Ayn Rand
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