[LiteraryLark]

I'm 23 and I am being strongly encouraged to find a career by parents and grandparents. FT is not enough, I need health benefits by 26 and therefore, I need to start planning now so I can be settled into a career and not worry about my meds and health benefits.

I pursued a career in a hotel. Housekeeping pretty much ruined that for me, although I just had a second interview for a front desk agent. I may or may not get that job, and I'm not sure whether to take it if I'm offered because I think it might be too stressful and I got bad vibes from the people who interviewed me.

In the meantime I applied to a dozen other FT jobs, though none really appeal to me career-wise.

Now, I've spent all day researching a career as a Real Estate Agent. My qualities, personality, attributes, characteristics, needs, wants, and goals all seem to match up with being a Real Estate agent. I got the idea when my family moved 11 years ago. I sat with my parents during the meetings with the agent, went along to all the open houses, and I really enjoyed watching the agent and how she handled everything. I found out today, after visiting Century 21, that she has moved from Coldwell Banker to the Century 21, so if I do pursue a real estate career, I will have her as a mentor and I can shadow her while I complete the training to get my license.

Now, careers are not to be taken lightly. A career means "This is what I want to do for the rest of my life". I have to be happy with my career. And I know this isn't as importance, but my parents' and grandparents' say in the matter is also important, because I get all my advice from them. Today I told my grandparents about the real estate agent job, and they were not thrilled. I was so excited when I told them, then felt so defeated afterwards, because I had hoped they would also be just as excited and tell me what to say when my parents come home from vacation.

Like I said, I spent hours and hours all day today doing SERIOUS research and consideration on becoming a real estate agent. I know that not all real estate agents make much money, and that sometimes you go weeks or even months without a paycheck, therefore, you need at least a year's worth of a nest egg saved up to get me through my first paycheck. I know that real estate agents work on their own schedule and "be their own boss", but that they also work very hard and you make what you earn. I know being a real estate agent is NOT easy, and there will be some things I will need to do that is out of my comfort zone, but I also know I will go through training and have the option of shadowing and additional training at Century 21. Century 21 claims that they will hire me without experience and will help me with getting a license.

I am meeting with the hiring manager at Century 21 on Monday at 9am, and I should also be hearing back from the hotel that day.

I may be overthinking, but I need a career, and A) I may not get the job at the hotel OR Century 21 and B) I don't know which career to choose. I've wanted to do hotel work since I was 4, and I've also wanted to be a real estate for over 10 years.

I am also concerned I will let my parents and grandparents sway my decision. How do I not do that? If this is what I want, I should pursue it, but my family ultimately wants me to be realistic, and I'm afraid they will tell my I'm not cut out for hotel work or real estate work. I want to enter Century 21 with confidence that I will get the job, not "Oh, how will I tell my parents and what they will think of me if I pursue this?"

What should I do?

I'm so pleased to hear this. Your posts are always so smart, I was hoping you'd come round to the idea of doing something different for a living. I'm sure other people will chip in with their advice, but my first reaction from reading this apart from YAY is to say don't think this career decision is "it". It won't be. Nowadays people do several things before they retire, and it's not necessarily what they started doing. I studied medicine, hated it, switched to science, worked in a lab, got bored, retrained in management, worked in healthcare and now I work for myself, as an educator. And am doing training as a Company Secretary. I'm 50 next year. Each change was part of a natural process of my personal development. I can't think of many people my age who studied one thing and are still doing it. So chillax about your decision, and see it as something you'll do for the next few years. That might be 5 or 10 or whatever, but take the pressure off yourself that you have to get every decision 100% right. You don't. You make the best choices you can with the facts you have. If real estate is your thing, go for it. Your family love and support you, and will go with you on this. I hope you enjoy it and look forward to reading more of your posts to let us know how you're doing!

[LucyG]

These days people change jobs and careers several times in their lives so find something you enjoy doing now, pursue it, and if need be you can always change careers in the future. And do be careful about choosing a career to please your family. That seldom works out in the long run.

[LiteraryLark]

Originally Posted by Little Cat

I'm so pleased to hear this. Your posts are always so smart, I was hoping you'd come round to the idea of doing something different for a living. I'm sure other people will chip in with their advice, but my first reaction from reading this apart from YAY is to say don't think this career decision is "it". It won't be. Nowadays people do several things before they retire, and it's not necessarily what they started doing. I studied medicine, hated it, switched to science, worked in a lab, got bored, retrained in management, worked in healthcare and now I work for myself, as an educator. And am doing training as a Company Secretary. I'm 50 next year. Each change was part of a natural process of my personal development. I can't think of many people my age who studied one thing and are still doing it. So chillax about your decision, and see it as something you'll do for the next few years. That might be 5 or 10 or whatever, but take the pressure off yourself that you have to get every decision 100% right. You don't. You make the best choices you can with the facts you have. If real estate is your thing, go for it. Your family love and support you, and will go with you on this. I hope you enjoy it and look forward to reading more of your posts to let us know how you're doing!

Awww thank you sooooo much! I really appreciate it.

I try my best to be smart and look at the big picture.

My biggest concern is my meds, which is why a FT job with benefits is important. My parents' rule is that as long as I am on my meds, I can stay with them as long as I'd like. It's never been an issue before, not to the point of being threatened to be kicked out, but there was two weeks I didn't take them consistently and it spun me pretty bad, but my Dad and I have an alarm system in place on our phones to be sure I am on top of my meds, and after that scare and my hospitalization my meds are my biggest priority because knowing what I know from my parents in law enforcement, the last thing I want is to be off my meds and homeless.

After doing research, it sounds like I won't likely receive medical benefits as a real estate agent, but then again, let's say it takes three years to build up my clientele...by then, if I started now, I'd be making enough money to pay for my own medical insurance.

And I don't have any input outside of my immediate family. My dad spent his whole life in law enforcement, my mom worked at Travelsmith and Broaderbund for several years then got into law enforcement, my Papa found his career in cable and stayed with them for over 40 years, and my Mamma was a temp until she was hired by KJ until she retired. So generally, people in my family find their passion right off the bat, and here I am not able to keep a job for more than a couple months...so that is what I fear...my family won't believe in me because I've never proven I can hold down a job.

But thank you so much for your support! That means so much to me!

Very welcome, and thanks for the friend request! Glad to accept.

OK! I see what you mean now, about your family finding their thing and sticking to it. They're lucky, and maybe even quite rare nowadays. Seeing as you get on well with them, maybe that's another good topic for conversation - what helped them decided and stay with it. I live in England so I can't give you practical advice on other sources of info, but I'm sure there must be. I'd start with questionnaires like Myers Briggs. That finds out what sort of personality you have and what you're best suited to doing. It's a more complex version of "if you're quiet, you'd hate working in a bar" - and there are lots of resources like that on PC. For me, there was a big disconnect with what I was good at at school and thought I wanted to do, and the kind of person I am and how I want to spend each day. There may be other state provided resources like a careers office or advisory service, and it won't just be for people who left school. Yes, there's the internet nowadays and people don't bother with libraries so much, but that's somewhere else to consider too. And when you decide on something, talk to someone who already does that. Ask them what it's really like. Hopefully someone from the US will come onto the thread and talk about benefits, because meds are free in the U.K. As is all our healthcare.

FWIW my dad had the same job for about 40 years and I never held one for more than 4-5 and we always argued about this. For me, each new thing was a step up financially and in my lifestyle (like not being tied to a desk M-F 9-5)........

Good luck

[LiteraryLark]

Originally Posted by Little Cat

Very welcome, and thanks for the friend request! Glad to accept.

OK! I see what you mean now, about your family finding their thing and sticking to it. They're lucky, and maybe even quite rare nowadays. Seeing as you get on well with them, maybe that's another good topic for conversation - what helped them decided and stay with it. I live in England so I can't give you practical advice on other sources of info, but I'm sure there must be. I'd start with questionnaires like Myers Briggs. That finds out what sort of personality you have and what you're best suited to doing. It's a more complex version of "if you're quiet, you'd hate working in a bar" - and there are lots of resources like that on PC. For me, there was a big disconnect with what I was good at at school and thought I wanted to do, and the kind of person I am and how I want to spend each day. There may be other state provided resources like a careers office or advisory service, and it won't just be for people who left school. Yes, there's the internet nowadays and people don't bother with libraries so much, but that's somewhere else to consider too. And when you decide on something, talk to someone who already does that. Ask them what it's really like. Hopefully someone from the US will come onto the thread and talk about benefits, because meds are free in the U.K. As is all our healthcare.

FWIW my dad had the same job for about 40 years and I never held one for more than 4-5 and we always argued about this. For me, each new thing was a step up financially and in my lifestyle (like not being tied to a desk M-F 9-5)........

Good luck

I have several reasons why I can't stay in one job, but I'm not going to go into it. Mostly has to do with being forced into work too soon after my hospitalization, only recently did I became serious about work and finding my passion. Century 21 also has a questionnaire to see how you'd fit as a real estate agent...it's about 60 questions and it's an in-depth survey, but I've taken simpler tests and I seem to fit in well.

Being a realtor and being a good real estate agent is to have a specialty. I think my specialty would be to flip houses. I know nothing about it, but I have an artistic vision to look at a house and to determine what would make it look amazing.

[LiteraryLark]

This is a message from my mom on my FB timeline just now:

"Hey Ms. Literary Lark, I just want to tell you how much I admire your strength and determination in the face of obstacles in your path. Many times through Life, I've found myself hanging on the cliff with only ice picks and sheer will alone to keep me moving. I see deep waters and strength in you. Bravo!"

"Thank you mom. I'd like to sit down and talk about my goals and how I'd like to move forward in life."

"I've always found it difficult to see you or (brother) struggle. More difficult, in fact, than my own struggles. Harder still know when to let you struggle and when to reach out and help you back up again."


This is very comforting for me to hear. It's a huge relief. I was worried how to even bring up this discussion, now it's out in the open and I can share how I feel knowing she is open to hear it.

Hey LL, try this quiz
https://www.16personalities.com/free-personality-test
What did you come out as? I'm a mediator. The description sure fits me!

[LiteraryLark]

I had a chat with my parents about the real estate job. They told me to beware of commission jobs. She said that my realtor's husband is a police seargent and that she probably receives medical benefits from him. They didn't tell me no, don't do this, but to be realistic.

[LiteraryLark]

Originally Posted by Little Cat

Hey LL, try this quiz
https://www.16personalities.com/free-personality-test
What did you come out as? I'm a mediator. The description sure fits me!

CAMPAIGNER PERSONALITY (ENFP, -A/-T)

It doesn’t interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for – and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart’s longing. It doesn’t interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool – for love – for your dreams – for the adventure of being alive.
Oriah Mountain Dreamer
The Campaigner personality is a true free spirit. They are often the life of the party, but unlike types in the Explorer Role group, Campaigners are less interested in the sheer excitement and pleasure of the moment than they are in enjoying the social and emotional connections they make with others. Charming, independent, energetic and compassionate, the 7% of the population that they comprise can certainly be felt in any crowd.

Campaigner personality
You Can Change the World With Just an Idea

More than just sociable people-pleasers though, Campaigners, like all their Diplomat cousins, are shaped by their Intuitive (N) quality, allowing them to read between the lines with curiosity and energy. They tend to see life as a big, complex puzzle where everything is connected – but unlike Analyst personality types, who tend to see that puzzle as a series of systemic machinations, Campaigners see it through a prism of emotion, compassion and mysticism, and are always looking for a deeper meaning.

Campaigners are fiercely independent, and much more than stability and security, they crave creativity and freedom.
Many other types are likely to find these qualities irresistible, and if they’ve found a cause that sparks their imagination, Campaigners will bring an energy that oftentimes thrusts them into the spotlight, held up by their peers as a leader and a guru – but this isn’t always where independence-loving Campaigners want to be. Worse still if they find themselves beset by the administrative tasks and routine maintenance that can accompany a leadership position. Campaigners’ self-esteem is dependent on their ability to come up with original solutions, and they need to know that they have the freedom to be innovative – they can quickly lose patience or become dejected if they get trapped in a boring role.

Don’t Lose That ’Little Spark of Madness’

Luckily, Campaigners know how to relax, and they are perfectly capable of switching from a passionate, driven idealist in the workplace to that imaginative and enthusiastic free spirit on the dance floor, often with a suddenness that can surprise even their closest friends. Being in the mix also gives them a chance to connect emotionally with others, giving them cherished insight into what motivates their friends and colleagues. They believe that everyone should take the time to recognize and express their feelings, and their empathy and sociability make that a natural conversation topic.

The Campaigner personality type needs to be careful, however – if they rely too much on their intuition, assume or anticipate too much about a friend’s motivations, they can misread the signals and frustrate plans that a more straightforward approach would have made simple. This kind of social stress is the bugbear that keeps harmony-focused Diplomats awake at night. Campaigners are very emotional and sensitive, and when they step on someone’s toes, they both feel it.

Campaigners will spend a lot of time exploring social relationships, feelings and ideas before they find something that really rings true. But when they finally do find their place in the world, their imagination, empathy and courage are likely to produce incredible results.

[Lovino]

It's amazing you've found not only one, but two different careers you're passionate about. When choosing a career, you have to do what's best for you and you alone. I'm sorry to hear that you haven't been getting much support from family members, however they shouldn't be deciding your career for you. Working at a hotel or doing real estate are both admirable and appealing. The decision is ultimately up to you and the opportunities given to you. Apply to the career you can see yourself doing years down the line and that suits your needs better, whatever they may be. Your parents will come to accept your career regardless of what you pick, since it's your life and not theirs.

Although you shouldn't take the decision lightly, please keep in mind that you're never stuck in the same career forever. If one job or career doesn't work out, you can always work towards another.

[unaluna]

https://www.cpp.com/products

Have you taken the strong interest inventory? It gets more specific about actual jobs. Mine actually said nightclub entertainer and i did end up doing stand up comedy!