[Me282]

I am new here and looking for advice. And need to vent. I have a bad situation at work, one of my customers has mistaken my friendliness as interest. I've never given him any reason to believe we were more than casual friends. He is the visity type and i had been told he is harmless. He stops in often but just in the past week it has increased to four or five times a day and he lingers. I've been discouraging this because he immediately starts in on me that i never pay attention to him anymore, I won't come and see him, he's at the bottom of the food chain he says. He also introduced me to his kids before then later on said he told them I was his girlfriend. I thought he was joking around. Today he asked when am I going to come see him or is he going to have to drag me away. It's uncomfortable now.
I have anxiety and it's usually manageable for me but i am shutting down bad. I keep going back and forth ready to flat tell him to stop then I freeze up and want to go hide because I'm not sure what his reaction will be. Thank you for listening

I think you need to tell this guy firmly that you aren't looking for a romantic relationship. He may take it hard at first but if you tell him clearly he should get the message. If he continues to bug you after that, I would bring it up to your boss.

[Me282]

This was my goal for the week. I have told him before and then things seemed to be normal for awhile. Usually it is fleeting contact or I try to keep it that way. I work by myself and it's so frustrating because as soon as I am ready to say hey look I'm not interested he gets bold and creepy. Monday I had my back turned and heard somebody come in so turn around and he had his arms out walking toward me. And makes comments about taking me home. It seems to be a joke to him, he has to see my reaction. I want to crawl under a rock. I'm trying to separate what I might be overreacting on because when I start to panic i nitpick and overanalyze everything to death. I'm a mess and it hasnt been this bad in months. Thank you again for listening, I really appreciate it

[Gr3tta_0]

You work alone, and this guy is really bothering you. Dont worry about "overreacting," do what you need to to feel safe. Be firm in telling this guy you are not romantically interested, and you do not find jokes about taking you home funny. Let him know he crossed the line.
I would also report it to your supervisor. The guys name, and/or a description of him, and the things hes been saying and doing. Just in case you need the support of a supervisor later.
Im sorry hes making you so anxious. Hopefully he gets the message and leaves you alone.

[BrokeTech]

Omg, I used to have issues like this when I worked at hotels, and I worked overnight by myself most of the time--extra creepy. I never had anyone quite this bad, though. He really sounds scary, like not the type to understand or fully get the message. If it were me, I'd also not feel comfortable telling him to leave me alone/stop coming in, which is what I'd want. But he sounds like he doesn't understand what's socially appropriate, which would freak me out in terms of just being very direct with him and being by myself.

The person I had closest to this guy you're describing, I basically did like scaredandconfused advised and said I'm not looking for a relationship. And then the idiot started talking about friends with benefits! It took a while to get rid of him, but I just kept saying no to everything. With this guy asking "when are you coming to see me" and stuff like that, I'd respond, "I'm not, I'm not looking for anything like that." Basically, just keep saying "no"/answering in the negative.

[notz]

I totally agree with Gr3tta. Saying you are not comfortable with his insinuations that there is anything more than a work relationship is definitely in order. I would be reporting this harassment (and it is just that) to my boss in writing for documentation first thing tomorrow. He may be a client but that doesn't give him the right to stalk you. You don't have to feel panic like that at work.

ETA:

Sexual harassment is a form of sex discrimination that violates Title VII of the Civil Rights Act of 1964. Title VII applies to employers with 15 or more employees, including state and local governments. It also applies to employment agencies and to labor organizations, as well as to the federal government.

The harasser can be the victim's supervisor, a supervisor in another area, a co-worker, or someone who is not an employee of the employer, such as a client or customer.