[GoodVibrations101]

My father has been giving me job advice ever since I was a teenager. It is his favorite--and only--topic of conversation.

But I work in academics, and my father doesn't understand the requirements of different sorts of jobs in my industry. But he thinks he has it all figured out. He keeps advising me about things to do, and most of his advice is unworkable.

Plus, my father is a doomsday sort of thinker. He always expects the worst and counsels worst-case scenario thinking. So when something in my career does go wrong, he isn't sympathetic, but he says, "I told you so!"

Does anyone else get bad advice from family members or from friends, who think they have good ideas?

Does anyone else have a family member who is a worst-case scenario thinker who always expects the worst to happen?

Oh gosh, I can soooooo relate to this. Neither of my parents work in business but I do and they don't get it but give advice just like your dad's. I just say thank you, then ignore it and do what I think is best, lol. I have learned to not even ask them. I simply tell them now what I am doing. Only you know best since you're in academia and know the industry. Ignore the negativity. Try to filter that out if you can. (((hugs)))

[hvert]

Not a family member, but I have a friend who recommends really menial jobs to me, stuff that's very entry level when I've been in my field for over 15 years! He would get upset when I didn't follow up on his lousy leads. So annoying. It definitely affected our friendship. I don't tell my parents anything - they wouldn't understand.

It's maddening, unwanted advice and people who get snotty when you don't take it!

[GoodVibrations101]

Originally Posted by hvert

Not a family member, but I have a friend who recommends really menial jobs to me, stuff that's very entry level when I've been in my field for over 15 years! He would get upset when I didn't follow up on his lousy leads. So annoying. It definitely affected our friendship. I don't tell my parents anything - they wouldn't understand.

It's maddening, unwanted advice and people who get snotty when you don't take it!

I would find this type of advice to take any job, including entry-level menial jobs, to be really depressing. I can see why it affects your friendship. I would consider that sort of advice to be a dig at my abilities, my experience, my training. I know some people cannot see from another person's viewpoint, so it could just be your friend's viewpoint of his own career, but I would still be upset.

[Shazerac]

Most of my family is unemployed. My mother sells roses off a cart on Bourbon street in New Orleans. I guess job advice is the one thing I don't have to deal with from my family

[hvert]

I think my friend just had no idea what I did or wanted to do. I wasn't working for a while, by choice, and he didn't get it.

Originally Posted by GoodVibrations101

Does anyone else get bad advice from family members or from friends, who think they have good ideas?

My father was the same way. I finally stopped listening to him. He had no idea what the job search was like for my field or even.. modern times. I had to stop listening to him but pretended like I was taking his advice.

Later I did a few strategies that where "thinking out side the box" and a friend warned me up and down it wouldn't work. I stopped talking to her after it became more depressing and less friendship and it worked out amazingly. A few years later I found out she did the same thing.

Originally Posted by GoodVibrations101

My father has been giving me job advice ever since I was a teenager. It is his favorite--and only--topic of conversation.

But I work in academics, and my father doesn't understand the requirements of different sorts of jobs in my industry. But he thinks he has it all figured out. He keeps advising me about things to do, and most of his advice is unworkable.

Plus, my father is a doomsday sort of thinker. He always expects the worst and counsels worst-case scenario thinking. So when something in my career does go wrong, he isn't sympathetic, but he says, "I told you so!"

Does anyone else get bad advice from family members or from friends, who think they have good ideas?

Does anyone else have a family member who is a worst-case scenario thinker who always expects the worst to happen?

I gave you great job advice (I think) on your other thread but you completely ignored it. Why? Join a teacher forum for insight and advice about job hunting, and for emotional support from other teachers who've been fired from their teaching jobs too. Why not? Also, like I advised, your best bet to finding another teaching job is to substitute teach in a long-term assignment, so that you and the school staff and students can figure out if you'd be a good fit for a permanent teaching job there, if and when a teaching job becomes available.

I get that your upset and frustrated with being fired. But not everyone is going to offer you the advice you want, the way you want it. If you already know your dad is a doomsdayer and he doesn't work in academia like you do, why would you seek advice/emotional support from him? If he doesn't validate your feelings or offer you empathy or sympathy, then he is not someone you should ever go to for emotional support when you need it.

My mother is mentally ill, and has never been a source of emotional support for me my entire life. And when I've had traumatic life experiences, I find other people to go to for emotional support, who have shown me that they care about me in that way.

Right now, you need to surround yourself with people who work in education, whether that's in person or online via teacher forums, who know your line of work, who've been fired from teaching jobs, who can offer you empathetic support and job-searching tips that make sense for your education industry. Asking someone who works in retail for example, for advice how you can get a teaching job, makes no sense. So, that is why I advise you to seek online forums where teachers go to chat with each other. That is probably your best online source for job searching tips.

[GoodVibrations101]

Originally Posted by cielpur

I gave you great job advice (I think) on your other thread but you completely ignored it. Why? Join a teacher forum for insight and advice about job hunting, and for emotional support from other teachers who've been fired from their teaching jobs too. Why not? Also, like I advised, your best bet to finding another teaching job is to substitute teach in a long-term assignment, so that you and the school staff and students can figure out if you'd be a good fit for a permanent teaching job there, if and when a teaching job becomes available.

I get that your upset and frustrated with being fired. But not everyone is going to offer you the advice you want, the way you want it. If you already know your dad is a doomsdayer and he doesn't work in academia like you do, why would you seek advice/emotional support from him? If he doesn't validate your feelings or offer you empathy or sympathy, then he is not someone you should ever go to for emotional support when you need it.

My mother is mentally ill, and has never been a source of emotional support for me my entire life. And when I've had traumatic life experiences, I find other people to go to for emotional support, who have shown me that they care about me in that way.

Right now, you need to surround yourself with people who work in education, whether that's in person or online via teacher forums, who know your line of work, who've been fired from teaching jobs, who can offer you empathetic support and job-searching tips that make sense for your education industry. Asking someone who works in retail for example, for advice how you can get a teaching job, makes no sense. So, that is why I advise you to seek online forums where teachers go to chat with each other. That is probably your best online source for job searching tips.

I appreciate your advice in the other thread, and I just haven't gotten around to responding to it yet. Thank you for your comment. Getting a long-term substitute position is one option, and there are other options. I already have one part-time job that pays well for what it requires. I've interviewed for many new part-time jobs in the last couple weeks, and I think I will be hired as an adjunct college teacher in a couple weeks. The background check is just finishing up now, so I think I have this new teaching job for two courses. I am exploring all of my options, including long-term substitute teaching.

Originally Posted by GoodVibrations101

I appreciate your advice in the other thread, and I just haven't gotten around to responding to it yet. Thank you for your comment. Getting a long-term substitute position is one option, and there are other options. I already have one part-time job that pays well for what it requires. I've interviewed for many new part-time jobs in the last couple weeks, and I think I will be hired as an adjunct college teacher in a couple weeks. The background check is just finishing up now, so I think I have this new teaching job for two courses. I am exploring all of my options, including long-term substitute teaching.

Ok that is good to hear that you found an adjunct teaching job, and will consider long-term substitute teaching should you decide to return to the K-12 school system.

I taught as an adjunct part-time, 32 hours a week, until the community college (that is for-profit) closed. The only non-profit community college in my city, requires its instructors to have a masters and phd, or two masters degrees. But for-profit community college programs, or business colleges, only require teaching experience and a masters degree, and sometimes, a teaching license.

Just remember, don't choose people like your father for job advice, if you know they can't relate to your situation, or if you know they aren't capable of providing you with emotional support or relevant job advice.

Definitely check out online teaching forums. They served me well when I was actively teaching.

[seesaw]

Originally Posted by GoodVibrations101

My father has been giving me job advice ever since I was a teenager. It is his favorite--and only--topic of conversation.

But I work in academics, and my father doesn't understand the requirements of different sorts of jobs in my industry. But he thinks he has it all figured out. He keeps advising me about things to do, and most of his advice is unworkable.

Plus, my father is a doomsday sort of thinker. He always expects the worst and counsels worst-case scenario thinking. So when something in my career does go wrong, he isn't sympathetic, but he says, "I told you so!"

Does anyone else get bad advice from family members or from friends, who think they have good ideas?

Does anyone else have a family member who is a worst-case scenario thinker who always expects the worst to happen?

Oh yes, my dad LOVES to tell me how I should handle job interviews when he has NO experience in my field. He works in aviation and I work in nonprofit development. He has no experience in philanthropy but he loves to tell me what I should do to land a new job. Furthermore he likes to try and tell me what to do with every aspect of my life. He's a ******* control freak.

I no longer have contact with him because of his controlling and narcissistic nature.

On another note, lots of people try to tell me I should only have a 2 page resume. And that works if you are entry level, but if you're required to show a 10 year history in the field as well as education, include an executive summary, and awards and accomplishments, I'm sorry 2 pages doesn't do it. And BTW, my 3 page resume and 2 page cover letter get me an interview almost every time, because they show my ability to write, think, and communicate. So my point is, things are different depending on what field you are in, and if someone isn't in that field, they should acknowledge that they don't know much about how things work in that field.

I'm sorry your family is doing this to you. The best advice I can offer is to ignore him or just change the subject or spend as little time with him as possible.

Good luck,

Seesaw