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Magnate
Member Since Jan 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 2,456
11 86 hugs
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#1
I've gone on interviews where i had it in the bag, but wanting to be honest i admit i have a disability. No longer being offered the job and never hear from them again. It just happened, it has happened, no one wants to work with someone whose disabled.
Despite the laws, despite the regulations. It's the kiss of death in an interview. I've learned. I haven't even admitted it to my current job. They may have found out but they haven't told me. I have no plans to admit it either. I'm doing what i can to avoid sharing that information also. I just wish honesty was ok. __________________ Son: 14, 12/15/2009 R.I.P. Daughter: 20 Diagnosis: Bipolar with Psychosis. Latuda 100 mgs. |
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CioCioSan1701, fishjam, mote.of.soul, TunedOut
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Feb 2014
Location: USA
Posts: 4,703
10 172 hugs
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#2
Quote:
It’s the way it is. I would never talk about my mental health problems in a job interview . |
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fishjam
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buddha1too, CioCioSan1701
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Veteran Member
Member Since Sep 2011
Posts: 735
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#3
While there are laws on the books against discrimination, it's extremely hard to prove you've been discriminated against. leomama hit the nail on the head.
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Magnate
Member Since Sep 2019
Location: Earth
Posts: 2,854
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#4
I wish honesty was ok too!
I'm glad you have a job though. I hope its going well. |
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mote.of.soul
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buddha1too
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2014
Location: US
Posts: 22,367
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#5
Is there any reason you need to disclose your disability in the interview? The only time you should disclose it is if you are requesting accommodations for your disability. Otherwise why do they need to know? You aren’t required to disclose at all. It’s nothing to do with being honest. Would you talk about your hypothetical diabetes or IBS or kidney stones on the interview? If you are honest, you must disclose everything then. How was it relevant to the interview?
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CioCioSan1701
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TunedOut
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Magnate
Member Since Jan 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 2,456
11 86 hugs
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#6
I needed time off for therapy appts. He was offering me the job than pulled the offer. Never called me or anything he said he'd do.
__________________ Son: 14, 12/15/2009 R.I.P. Daughter: 20 Diagnosis: Bipolar with Psychosis. Latuda 100 mgs. |
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Threadtastic Postaholic
Member Since Dec 2018
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 6,006
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5 192 hugs
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#7
__________________ "I carried a watermelon?" President of the no F's given society. |
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2014
Location: US
Posts: 22,367
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#8
It might have nothing to do with a disability but with a request for time off during work time. Depending on the job. My husband has a disability. No way he’d be allowed to leave the unit to go see a therapist. He sees a therapist when he is off. I have several colleagues with disabilities. They can’t go see therapists during the day. Sure they could take sick days but it cannot be regular occurrence. Not every job can accommodate you having to leave in the middle of the work day
He possibly pull the offer off because he can’t possibly provide that time off. Most jobs can’t. Disability or not Some people incorrectly assume that every disability must be accommodated in a work place. That is incorrect. Accommodation must be reasonable. In this particular work place leaving for a therapy appointment is possibly not reasonable |
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CioCioSan1701, sarahsweets
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Legendary
Member Since Jun 2016
Location: Italy
Posts: 11,817
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#9
i agree with the other wise and wonderful obviously wise posters. Unfortunately there's no way to truly know the reason why they didn't accept you. The best course of action may simply be to avoid telling that unless it is explicitly asked or relevant to what is actually discussed and necessary. Sending many safe, warm hugs to BOTH you, @Aviza, your Family, your Friends, your Children and ALL of your Loved Ones! Keep fighting and keep rocking NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, OK?!
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buddha1too
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Magnate
Member Since Jan 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 2,456
11 86 hugs
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#10
He okayed the time off, said it was no problem. He hired me until he found out i was on disability.
__________________ Son: 14, 12/15/2009 R.I.P. Daughter: 20 Diagnosis: Bipolar with Psychosis. Latuda 100 mgs. |
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2014
Location: US
Posts: 22,367
(SuperPoster!)
9 1,277 hugs
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#11
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Threadtastic Postaholic
Member Since Dec 2018
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 6,006
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5 192 hugs
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#12
If that was the real reason and you have anything concrete even documents or even your own written account see a lawyer. Everyone’s disability is private medical information. Your employer has no right to hear about this unless it’s for work accommodations. If he said it was fine, “ok’d “ time off, offered you the job how did he pull it after hearing about disability. How did he hear ? What was he allowing the time off for if he didn’t know about a disability then ?
__________________ "I carried a watermelon?" President of the no F's given society. |
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New Member
Member Since May 2021
Location: Maryland
Posts: 5
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#13
I am very jaded because of my experiences, but no employer is likely to hire us if they have been notified we have a disability. In fact, I have had to fight tooth and nail with lawyers at the forefront once I was “found out” and the employer was absolutely NOT going to give any accommodation-even if identified as reasonable under the ADA. It has gone from a discussion about how to obtain approval for a reasonable accommodation to the attorney fighting for severance every time. I have been fortunate enough to have executive level jobs and any weakness is considered the kiss of death. I am going through it again now because I forgot a conversation and wrote a poorly worded email. I don’t do that, but instead of asking me if I was okay, they wanted my head on a platter. They are threatening and really amping up the nastiness. It is situations like this why NO ONE ever gets to know my disability at work unless it is the only thing that is reasonable to tell them. Otherwise I am simply out sick or I have another kind of Dr appt - and I try to have these appt outside of working hours. Right now I need to work from home (different city) in order to revise my out of whack meds. It is a reasonable accommodation request that I HATED to make. Sure as can be - they are doing everything they can to fire me. I expect they’ll get me out of there on Tuesday. So heed my experience. Never tell unless you are forced into it. It is your business and yours alone.
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Aviza, mssweatypalms
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Magnate
Member Since Aug 2017
Location: earth
Posts: 2,063
6 1,598 hugs
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#14
I think the jobs that I have not told about my illness have treated me the best. I think the places that I asked for accommodations and disclosed my illness treated me the worst. So, at this point, I don't need accommodations so don't feel the need to disclose. Why do you have to disclose? The companies can easily find someone without a disability so I understand their perspective.
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