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Default Jun 12, 2022 at 11:30 AM
  #221
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i'm so sorry about your father, Have Hope
Thank you so much, @willowtigger! And sorry I missed your post yesterday!


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Default Jun 14, 2022 at 07:10 AM
  #222
I met with my CEO yesterday. So, I did not get fired, but I don't know when I will be able to take on more responsibility. I have been asking for weeks now, and it hasn't happened. My CEO said she leaves that stuff up to the individual managers, when I brought it up to her. Do they not trust that I can handle more? Do they think I cannot meet their expectations? Why not give me more, coach me and help me to meet the expectations? I don't get it.

As it is, with my father dying in the hospital right now, I don't feel it's the BEST time for me to take on more, so perhaps this is a blessing in disguise at the moment. It's far easier for me to do menial tasks with low stress, given the circumstances.

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Default Jun 18, 2022 at 08:26 AM
  #223
Wow - just WOW. I emailed that company last Friday and this past Friday about that job. NO REPLY!!!!!! They must have filled the position, but I am entirely put off that they refuse to thank me for my time and to let me know that the position has been filled. It's common courtesy to at least reply to a candidate to let them know. I spent hours prepping for those interviews, and had SIX individual interviews. The entire process was fairly grueling, and this is how they treat me? I am not taking it personally... it's the principle of the matter. Clearly, it's not a company I would really want to work for, if this is how they behave. HOW RUDE!

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Default Jun 23, 2022 at 07:23 AM
  #224
My current company handed me a MASSIVE project yesterday, due in 3 weeks, and for me to head it up. While on the one hand, it's nice they have faith in me to potentially step up to the plate because I've been asking for more responsibility in recent weeks, on the other hand, I just lost my father and am in no shape to take on a massive challenge. I was hoping to continue doing the easier work over the next coming weeks while I grieve the loss of my dad. But no, they handed me this enormous site audit project. I don't know if they are testing me, but it was my first thought.

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Default Jun 23, 2022 at 09:45 AM
  #225
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Originally Posted by Have Hope View Post
My current company handed me a MASSIVE project yesterday, due in 3 weeks, and for me to head it up. While on the one hand, it's nice they have faith in me to potentially step up to the plate because I've been asking for more responsibility in recent weeks, on the other hand, I just lost my father and am in no shape to take on a massive challenge. I was hoping to continue doing the easier work over the next coming weeks while I grieve the loss of my dad. But no, they handed me this enormous site audit project. I don't know if they are testing me, but it was my first thought.
do they know you lost your father?
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Default Jun 23, 2022 at 10:33 AM
  #226
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do they know you lost your father?
Yes. They are fully aware of that fact. They even sent me roses.

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Default Jun 23, 2022 at 10:41 AM
  #227
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Yes. They are fully aware of that fact. They even sent me roses.
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Default Jun 23, 2022 at 10:52 AM
  #228
I think and I have experience with loss of close family members that when you are back from bereavement leave, you are expected to do the work normally. If you cannot do it to full capacity , then that’s when you take extended bereavement leave/sick days etc In most jobs there are no such thing as light duty. You either do your job fully or you don’t. Not saying it’s the right thing but just saying that’s how it is.

How much bereavement do they give you? A week? Could you take more time off? For both my mother and my late son in law I had to take two weeks off each because not only i wasn’t up to it, my other family members needed by full time attention.

Some work places are terrible with giving bereavement. When my uncle unexpectedly died, my ONLY uncle, I was given a day. But my husband was told that death of wife’s uncle isn’t qualifying for bereavement days. So he pretty much was indirectly told he can’t go to a funeral. How stupid!!!! He of course went as he called in sick. But how bizarre
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Default Jun 23, 2022 at 11:32 AM
  #229
My company does not have official bereavement leave because it's too small of a company. They covered me somehow other than my needing to take vacation or sick days. I would feel guilty for taking more time, since they don't even have bereavement days available, although I could really use the additional time off. Of course, there's also the fact that I took a full month's medical leave in March. I don't know how amenable they are to me taking more time off at this stage, even for bereavement.

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Default Jun 23, 2022 at 11:33 AM
  #230
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This forum loves a Have Hope
@willowtigger,

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Default Jun 23, 2022 at 12:13 PM
  #231
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My company does not have official bereavement leave because it's too small of a company. They covered me somehow other than my needing to take vacation or sick days. I would feel guilty for taking more time, since they don't even have bereavement days available, although I could really use the additional time off. Of course, there's also the fact that I took a full month's medical leave in March. I don't know how amenable they are to me taking more time off at this stage, even for bereavement.
Yeah even though it’s called bereavement days at my work, it comes out of our sick days. So pretty much if you didn’t accumulate sick days, you would have to take bereavement days out of your pocket. It’s crazy. I think people should at least have a paid day or two for bereavement regardless if you accumulated sick days or not. People pretty much have to suck it up and go to work no matter what’s going on. Like they’d be able to work? Too much
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Default Jun 23, 2022 at 12:36 PM
  #232
I basically took 3 days off already, 4 including the Juneteenth holiday. I feel like any more and they will raise an eyebrow.

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Default Jun 23, 2022 at 12:45 PM
  #233
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I basically took 3 days off already, 4 including the Juneteenth holiday. I feel like any more and they will raise an eyebrow.
I get it. Most of us work and work our whole lives. I remember when my daughter got her first full time job after college (worked part time through college) and said “omg I have to be at work all day, when is this craziness going to end?” I laughed “End? It just began! Maybe it will end in 40 years? And for many people It will literally never end!” In my next life I’ll be independently wealthy hahaha
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Default Jun 23, 2022 at 04:05 PM
  #234
Exactly!!!!!

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Default Jun 24, 2022 at 06:12 AM
  #235
I've been given a huge website audit to perform and I've been put in charge of putting together the powerpoint presentation regarding the audit findings, the analysis and the recommendations. These presentations end up being quite lengthy.

This is the exact task that sent me to the hospital with a breakdown due to the stress and also due to hearing voices back in March, causing me to take a medical leave for a full month.

The difference now is that they've put ME in charge of the ENTIRE presentation, when previously the task was split between all of us team members. I have three weeks to complete it as well versus only four days.

Basically, I am freaking out. WHY they put ME in charge of the entire thing, when I haven't done many of these audits, if any, is beyond me. Are they trying to fire me? Set me up for failure? I do have help from a new employee who is more senior than me. So I am not entirely alone with it, but still. I wonder what is going on and why they have given me the whole thing to do, when my father JUST died, when I am under duress, and when this is the first full audit I've had to do.

I feel that I will fail. This is going to be a huge challenge for me, and in no way am I up for facing this challenge right now. I am scared and nervous. This is the LAST thing I needed right now. I was glad to have less responsibility on my plate and less stress so that I can deal with my father's death and my own grief. But now? This places a TON of stress and pressure on me.

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Default Jun 24, 2022 at 06:48 AM
  #236
Just do your best. That’s all we can really do. I don’t think they are very concerned about not giving people hard tasks after the death of a loved on. I’ve never heard of it. You are back to work so they give you tasks. They might be concerned on personal level but on professional level likely not.

I look at it this way. At some point you have to start doing these things at work: audits and presentations. They might think it’s time to start. Ask someone to look at it at the end. If you make mistakes, you’ll have to correct.

But I am sure you will do a good job. They never told you that your quality is bad. They just said you need more guidance than they think is reasonable. Now they want you to show them that you can do the job with minimal guidance. Just do the best you can. If you put full effort in, it will be just fine. I am sure you’ll do a nice audit and present well.

I think worrying about the result before you even start the task will hinder your performance. Just get it done the best you can

I understand about stress. But it’s part of the game. Not putting other jobs down but the only not stressful jobs are low wages ones. Jobs that require education and pay reasonably well are all stressful. There is no way out of it
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Default Jun 24, 2022 at 07:03 AM
  #237
Thanks, divine. I DID tell the CEO in my recent meeting (while my dad was still alive) that I WAS READY to take on more responsibility, AND I've mentioned this to my boss several times in the last month or so..... so, it's basically my own fault for telling them I am ready. And I WAS READY, BEFORE my father passed. But now that I am grieving the loss, I don't feel ready AT ALL. I want to just coast through work, with easier tasks. C'est la vie. What can I do, but do the work asked of me and try my best. At least I have 3 weeks to complete this task. Thank goodness. They probably feel that that is ample time so that I don't get too stressed out over it.

And yes, it IS part of the game. I am earning a high salary and with that, comes more stress. I AM thankful for my salary at least. It's helping me to put money into savings, and quite a bit each month.

However, I WILL keep looking for another job. I don't want to stay in this one, and I still want to switch gears and move into client services. I am not satisfied anymore with the kind of work I am doing. And it's just TOO HARD. It's very challenging work, and I'm not up for the challenge these days. Client services/client relations is far more my forte - I am good with clients and I know how to build a strong rapport.

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Default Jun 28, 2022 at 06:10 AM
  #238
The woman who is new and who is more senior to me is of little help to me on this audit. She is supposedly "supporting" me, but I am doing all the work.

I am freaking out.... I feel I will fail at this task asked of me and that they will fire me because I can't do a good job on the audit. I've never even done a full audit before. Even looking at other audit examples doesn't help that much because each website is unique, with it's own set of unique issues.

I'm going to fail!

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Default Jun 28, 2022 at 06:21 AM
  #239
Hang in there! One step at a time...

You can do it!
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Default Jun 28, 2022 at 06:22 AM
  #240
Thanks for your encouragement, @Bill3.

I wish I felt like I can do this.

I suspect that my male boss wants to see me get fired. I feel like he's set me up to fail. He didn't even show me how to do an audit correctly. He didn't teach me and he didn't help me the last time I did one about 70% correctly. He didn't show me what I needed to do differently in order to get it 100% right.

And now I am in charge of an entire audit by myself? It's a set up for failure.

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