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Default Apr 28, 2024 at 11:08 AM
  #1
I held a job as button pusher, peddle presser, crowd controller, puke and piss cleaner, key turner, height checker (and child/parent consoler) opening inspector, and the gal that powers everything down after screaming "ONE IN THE FRONT TWO IN THE BACK TALLEST IN THE VERY BACK, PLEASE KEEP YOUR HANDS *AND* FEET IN THE BOAT, DON'T ROCK THE BOAT, STAY SEATED, KEEP YOUR PHONES AWAY, PUT ALL LOOSE ARTICLES IN THE BIN, AND MOST IMPORTANTLY HAVE A FANTASTIC RIDE" "HEY, Y'ALL NEED TO SIT WITH TALLEST IN THE BACK" "NO SPLASHING" over the sound of 100 people for 13 hours a day at an amusement park (aka ride operator lmao. No grudges held there when spending 90% of my time at the log flume meanwhile some (fking MOST) other rides had a recording or a microphone and actual restraints because I made the mistake of allowing the upper ups to think I was one of like three people capable of dealing with the stress of station operator AND the boredom of tower operator who only responds to emergencies). That was for 5 summers, which yeah, is pretty good, but I got fired when I was at the height of my addiction and showed up high on opiates (it was that one time, and I feel awful for even trying to get away with that shyt).

Had a job at a pet rescue center just kinda taking care of the animals doing whatever needed to be done. For two months.

Have played on one of those street pianos and got some tips doing that. Tried starting a band but that backfired majorly.

Tried working at a coffee chain, after three days of "doing a good job" I got fired for calling in when I was vomiting every three seconds probably from working there.

Tried working as an associate at a dollar store, but I was spending more in gas and risking my life getting there driving through ice storms at night for $7.25/hr. Also got robbed during a shift. So that lasted three weeks.

So...don't really have any references or experience I can really allude to. Don't even have a fking address. Have a (recent) arrest history. Whether or not I can pass a drug test is up in the air because I could, but then do another "dissociate for three weeks and find myself in the South with track marks"

So, like, how could I turn things around, find something that I won't fk up, and make some money I can actually live off of

because this $900/mo SSDI/SSI combo ain't covering rent (JUST RENT. NO UTILITES. NO PARKING FEE. NO RENTERS INSURANCE) when the cheapest studio in the shyttiest part of the state where the building is likely to get raided or burned down is like $1200/mo and I kinda want to eat too. Yeah, I've applied for section 8 two years ago. Yes, there is an 8 year waitlist. Roommate and splitting rent (and splitting on the roommate lol) is an option, but that may lead to assault, homicide, or suicide on somebody's behalf when I get bad soooo, worth the risk? Perhaps. Still would struggle paying half of rent and half of the other shyt that's not covered in rent and affording food. Never fking mind all the medical bills I've racked up and will need when I start treatment and get back on meds again.

Honestly, just need life advice.

This is in NH btw (yeah, nice place just avoid any affordable parts of the southern cities. And I almost got an 811 place in Rochester which I guess is infamous for overdoses and my case manager was reluctant to push to get me there, but that 811 is worthless now that I'm not in any sort of treatment I think. There is trouble anywhere if you're looking for it though, I've found it in fking Grafton county).
If it'd be best to get out of state, I'd like to know the best way to go about that and where I'd have my best luck.

I really have a strong desire to make things better. I need guidance on how and I haven't found it anywhere.

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Default Apr 28, 2024 at 12:39 PM
  #2
I applaud you for trying to make changes. Have you tried vocational rehab services for people with disabilities in your state. Ours is very good. They’ll help you to write a resume, will find you jobs, help you to interview for it etc

I attached a link for your state VR

Bureau of Vocational Rehabilitation | Department of Education
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Default Apr 28, 2024 at 01:29 PM
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I was a waitress at a denny's type all-night restaurant, when i didnt even know that soup and salad courses were served before the entree. I was a perfume girl (but for men's cologne), i served jelly samples (bonne maman) in a grocery store, i was paid to influence voters at the polls (for like a city councilman or something), then i started working as a computer programmer, for thirty years of hell, discrimination, and intimidation. Then i was a manicurist who cleaned the entire shop on the weekend, including the bathrooms.

And i lived at my mom's and washed her clothes and her dishes and her smoke and bacon-grease encrusted kitchen while she and her sister belittled me, until they were silenced by what i can do with a little ammonia and a sponge. Oh, it just occurred to me - there was another option!
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Default Apr 28, 2024 at 02:45 PM
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I was a waitress at a denny's type all-night restaurant, when i didnt even know that soup and salad courses were served before the entree. I was a perfume girl (but for men's cologne), i served jelly samples (bonne maman) in a grocery store, i was paid to influence voters at the polls (for like a city councilman or something), then i started working as a computer programmer, for thirty years of hell, discrimination, and intimidation. Then i was a manicurist who cleaned the entire shop on the weekend, including the bathrooms.

And i lived at my mom's and washed her clothes and her dishes and her smoke and bacon-grease encrusted kitchen while she and her sister belittled me, until they were silenced by what i can do with a little ammonia and a sponge. Oh, it just occurred to me - there was another option!
How did you get those jobs though without any steady prior employment or education or ANYONE who could be a reference? Would it be a problem if I don’t have an address and can’t afford a PO Box so no fixed address and nowhere to send mail? How did you get to or from those jobs if they weren’t in walking distance or had overnight hours when it wouldn’t be safe to walk (not that walking in the day in some spots is safe lol, some dude on a main road pretty much just came up to me and asked me if I do drugs and would like to join. And 10 minutes later another dude was holding up traffic tweaking in an intersection lmao).

I’ll try and get a hold of voc rehab tomorrow, but I’ve heard from others it’s not super helpful resume writing is like “what do you have for prior work experience?” “Nothing that looks good on paper.” “Okay, what can you put down that does look good on paper?” Is basically what I’ve heard they do. And Ticket to work feels sketchy because of the way the employer network works and, trust me, I’ve tried working, earned $200 in a month but had to quit because I became incredibly unstable, and they docked me $300/mo from benefits that they didn’t bump up again until two years and many phone calls and paperwork later. But maybe I just don’t know how to work the system and don’t know how to find people that know how to work the system that are working in my best interest.

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Default Apr 28, 2024 at 03:41 PM
  #5
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How did you get those jobs though without any steady prior employment or education or ANYONE who could be a reference? Would it be a problem if I don’t have an address and can’t afford a PO Box so no fixed address and nowhere to send mail? How did you get to or from those jobs if they weren’t in walking distance or had overnight hours when it wouldn’t be safe to walk (not that walking in the day in some spots is safe lol, some dude on a main road pretty much just came up to me and asked me if I do drugs and would like to join. And 10 minutes later another dude was holding up traffic tweaking in an intersection lmao).

I’ll try and get a hold of voc rehab tomorrow, but I’ve heard from others it’s not super helpful resume writing is like “what do you have for prior work experience?” “Nothing that looks good on paper.” “Okay, what can you put down that does look good on paper?” Is basically what I’ve heard they do. And Ticket to work feels sketchy because of the way the employer network works and, trust me, I’ve tried working, earned $200 in a month but had to quit because I became incredibly unstable, and they docked me $300/mo from benefits that they didn’t bump up again until two years and many phone calls and paperwork later. But maybe I just don’t know how to work the system and don’t know how to find people that know how to work the system that are working in my best interest.
You don’t need prior experience or education for those jobs. Your doctor or therapist could maybe be your reference. For address perhaps you could inquire if you could put homeless or your last address.

I’d not go by you heard. I don’t know about “working the system”. But if you have no employment experience, they’ll help you to find a job that requires no experience.

State’s goal is to get you employed. Yes getting to and from a job is a problem. Is there any bus route?

Focus on disability vocational services not regular vocational services.
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Default Apr 28, 2024 at 03:48 PM
  #6
I don’t want another $7.25/hr 11 minute break job that expects me to be able to show up Sunday nights, Monday mornings, Tuesday nights, and then tells me there are no more shifts the rest of the week. Which, I have looked, is basically every job I could feasibly get.

Like I said I’ll go for voc rehab for people with disabilities but I am going to be pissed if they cause more harm than good.

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Default Apr 28, 2024 at 04:07 PM
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Oh yeah. My SIL helped me get some of the temp jobs. I dont know how she knew about them, but she was 6 ft tall with long blond wavy hair, so whatever she wanted, she got. She also pushed me to get a job as a stripper. That didnt work out, im a fat awkward little brunette. But what a positive influence in my life she was. /s

My first computer jobs, i made ridiculously low pay because i didnt know any better. My parents actually laughed at me when i told them. Its not like they or anybody advised me what to ask for. My parents werent trustworthy at all.

From what youve written here, it appears youve had some chances. Nobody has experience before they get a job, yet somehow...?
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Default Apr 28, 2024 at 11:49 PM
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Your sister sounds charming

I get I can get a job without experience, it's just to get a DECENT job experience and good references count, and I have yet to stick to a job for a credible amount of time without fking it up. I could keep trying. Maybe keep flying off the handle and keep having manic and mixed episodes and winding up in handcuffs or passed out in a bush or getting 18 staples. Worth another shot.

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Default Apr 29, 2024 at 02:57 AM
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Well minimum wage in my state is 10.33 but it doesn’t mean that’s what everyone pays. Ton of fast food and retail start with 15 or even 17. Things changed since covid. Do you know that every unqualified job only pays 7.25 in NH? Worth to take a look if some pays more.

If you have no qualifications or training or experience, you have to start somewhere. We all started somewhere. No one just starts with good jobs.

Talk to VR if they have apprenticeship options. Those might be better and you learn on the job. And you get paid
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Default Apr 29, 2024 at 07:53 AM
  #10
Lotta food delivery drivers being hired, so tips included. My car is broken down 1.5 hours north of here though, but I'm sure there's at least ONE place with a company vehicle that won't drug test me (even when I don't do drugs I do drugs) and will hire someone that got out of jail a short while ago.

If I look outside of walking distance, I could work severely limited hours (with the normal bus schedule, depending on where it is, any time between 7am and 6pm), no Sundays (and we ain't in the Bible belt so, yeah, anywhere expects the ability to show up on a weekend. I guess I could tell them if they want me to show up they'd have to drive me themselves. One of my past managers drove me to work one day from the hospital after someone slashed my tires and split my face open so it's a thing that can be done), and there is a night bus that runs until 10pm that you can access about 10% of the city with.

I get it. Apply everywhere and show up to interviews and all that shyt and worry about the details of drug tests, criminal background checks, or spiraling and not having the greatest impulse control and killing myself or starting a fire or throwing hot oil on someone or something when we get to that bridge.

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Default Apr 29, 2024 at 08:02 AM
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I'm gonna start a food stand selling twists on New England classic comfort food. We gonna be selling fluffernutters with two gallons of soft serve on top and jimmies to go with it and figure out how to make maple roasted moose work

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Default Apr 29, 2024 at 12:25 PM
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ugh I've been finding and applying to every position in New England that says they'll provide housing even if it's just seasonal (like inn keepers, camp hosts or hut caretakers) and a lot of them want references but literally nobody can attest to me not being crazy unstable.

Do you think my case manager I've known for like a week would pretend there's a chance I'd be a good, reliable employee and that an employer would be okay with someone trying to get you mental health services and to stop being homeless being a reference?

(If I get hired anywhere I will make an extreme effort to keep myself together enough to function at work).

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Default Apr 29, 2024 at 03:40 PM
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I held a job as button pusher, peddle presser, crowd controller, puke and piss cleaner, key turner, height checker (and child/parent consoler) opening inspector, and the gal that powers everything down after screaming "ONE IN THE FRONT TWO IN THE BACK TALLEST IN THE VERY BACK, PLEASE KEEP YOUR HANDS *AND* FEET IN THE BOAT, DON'T ROCK THE BOAT, STAY SEATED, KEEP YOUR PHONES AWAY, PUT ALL LOOSE ARTICLES IN THE BIN, AND MOST IMPORTANTLY HAVE A FANTASTIC RIDE" "HEY, Y'ALL NEED TO SIT WITH TALLEST IN THE BACK" "NO SPLASHING" over the sound of 100 people for 13 hours a day at an amusement park (aka ride operator lmao. No grudges held there when spending 90% of my time at the log flume meanwhile some (fking MOST) other rides had a recording or a microphone and actual restraints because I made the mistake of allowing the upper ups to think I was one of like three people capable of dealing with the stress of station operator AND the boredom of tower operator who only responds to emergencies). That was for 5 summers, which yeah, is pretty good, but I got fired when I was at the height of my addiction and showed up high on opiates (it was that one time, and I feel awful for even trying to get away with that shyt).

Had a job at a pet rescue center just kinda taking care of the animals doing whatever needed to be done. For two months.

Have played on one of those street pianos and got some tips doing that. Tried starting a band but that backfired majorly.

Tried working at a coffee chain, after three days of "doing a good job" I got fired for calling in when I was vomiting every three seconds probably from working there.

Tried working as an associate at a dollar store, but I was spending more in gas and risking my life getting there driving through ice storms at night for $7.25/hr. Also got robbed during a shift. So that lasted three weeks.

So...don't really have any references or experience I can really allude to. Don't even have a fking address. Have a (recent) arrest history. Whether or not I can pass a drug test is up in the air because I could, but then do another "dissociate for three weeks and find myself in the South with track marks"

So, like, how could I turn things around, find something that I won't fk up, and make some money I can actually live off of

because this $900/mo SSDI/SSI combo ain't covering rent (JUST RENT. NO UTILITES. NO PARKING FEE. NO RENTERS INSURANCE) when the cheapest studio in the shyttiest part of the state where the building is likely to get raided or burned down is like $1200/mo and I kinda want to eat too. Yeah, I've applied for section 8 two years ago. Yes, there is an 8 year waitlist. Roommate and splitting rent (and splitting on the roommate lol) is an option, but that may lead to assault, homicide, or suicide on somebody's behalf when I get bad soooo, worth the risk? Perhaps. Still would struggle paying half of rent and half of the other shyt that's not covered in rent and affording food. Never fking mind all the medical bills I've racked up and will need when I start treatment and get back on meds again.

Honestly, just need life advice.

This is in NH btw (yeah, nice place just avoid any affordable parts of the southern cities. And I almost got an 811 place in Rochester which I guess is infamous for overdoses and my case manager was reluctant to push to get me there, but that 811 is worthless now that I'm not in any sort of treatment I think. There is trouble anywhere if you're looking for it though, I've found it in fking Grafton county).
If it'd be best to get out of state, I'd like to know the best way to go about that and where I'd have my best luck.

I really have a strong desire to make things better. I need guidance on how and I haven't found it anywhere.
Omg, sorry to hear that! How do you afford to eat? Do you get EBT or food from a foodbank?

Advertise your services on Nextdoor.com & Craigslist.
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Default Apr 29, 2024 at 04:15 PM
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Omg, sorry to hear that! How do you afford to eat? Do you get EBT or food from a foodbank?

Advertise your services on Nextdoor.com & Craigslist.
I go to places like the soup kitchen and churches with similar meals generally. When I'm amicable, some of the folks I've met that are pretty forgiving (for now) and have helped me out. A couple times people have even let me take full range of the kitchen because, as word is, I can take the assortment of groceries you have left over when you really need to go food shopping, but don't and make a unique meal you'd never see in a restaurant that you even want to eat.

I signed up for Nextdoor. This site is incredibly difficult to use, asked for my permission for a bunch of access to my email three times, and it's just people saying "BED BATH AND BEYOND IS CLOSING OMG" and "$3000/mo 2 bedroom for rent" and "Dear trick-or-treaters, beware the bobcats." I'm trying to figure out how to get it to show most recent posts because the one at the top is from early March.
edit: got tf off that site. It's just people posting about dead teachers, putting their shoes for sale (and not getting any responses), and saying "I'll shovel your driveway"... dude, we haven't had a snow worthy of shoveling in months and it won't even drop below freezing probably until October. I couldn't even think of a way to advertise services for the area without feeling like I'm going to wind up shooting in a basement with someone who's going to violate me when I pass out. Paranoid? Maybe. But I'd rather not wind up in a state where I want to get myself in that situation and have yet another means to do it.

HAHA, I found a freelance writing job on Craigslist that supposedly only hires the best of the best, but on the page it says "our clinte is constantly evolving."

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Default Apr 29, 2024 at 06:25 PM
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That is a real cooking talent.

I pretty much just go on nextdoor to harass people for not being woke enough in our exreeeemely woke town. But usually somebody else will beat me to it.
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Default Apr 30, 2024 at 03:51 PM
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Found someone looking for help with some construction work. Gonna do it. I know nothing about construction haha, but it's building a stage it can't be that hard right?

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Default Apr 30, 2024 at 08:37 PM
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Shyt man, when I have full access to a legitimate computer (monitor, keyboard, mouse and all) I guess I go a little nuts and respond to every single remote writing job on Craigslist, apply to every live-in position in New England I can find, and anything that can provide rent and food in this city (I mean, that was 3 positions that I am completely unqualified for, but a gal's gotta try).

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Default May 01, 2024 at 08:38 AM
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Just curious, do you have any past writing experience? A lot of people think that freelance writing is something you can just get in to. I am a freelance writer these days and make a decent living from it, but I have a lot of experience in writing, editorial and translation work.
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Default May 01, 2024 at 10:07 AM
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Not really. I took two college writing classes, edited a couple SOPs for the park I was at before the season, and published a book, but nothing that screams "I AM A REINCARNATION OF VIRGINIA WOOLF! OWOOOOOO!"

Guess that's not an option anymore because it sounds like there isn't an opportunity to gain experience there.

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Default May 01, 2024 at 10:40 AM
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When I'd been out of the workforce for a long time, I started out by volunteering. I figured it would give me something current on my resume, and show that I was capable of showing up regularly for something and would give me a current reference.


Then I took the crappiest job that would basically hire anyone with a pulse, which was telemarketing a newspaper for minimum wage. Lasted at that a month, butt was able to turn that job into a marginally less awful job doing telephone fundraising for a charity. Kept that job for about 6 months. Was able to use that job to get my current job which pays ok, and that I enjoy.

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