How to get a new job with mental illness...?

I've talked a lot about what's going on with me in other threads already so I'll try to keep it brief here: I used to be a high-paid web developer. I was living alone in a nice downtown studio apartment, paid enough to cover all living expenses, including a decent apartment and enough for monthly payments on a car. But in 2022 I started getting lonely and isolated because I couldn't make friends in the city where I was living. So I went to go live with my family. But then I realized the work was taking a huge toll on my mental health, so I quit, and was planning to take some time off to recoup and find a new job. But then what followed after that was a chain of personal tragedies and family drama that left me with crippling depression and severe atrophy to both my professional and social skills.

I have autism spectrum and ADHD symptoms, crippling depression and anxiety, and I can barely function most days. I currently work a little above minimum wage as a closing shift grocery store produce clerk at about 30 hours a week, which is about as much as my mind and body can handle of that kind of work, and even then I have to call in sick for mental illness reasons occasionally. It's not paying nearly enough to cover all my living expenses and my family is supporting me by letting me live in their home and letting me use their cars or give me rides when that's not possible. (My car was totaled by a distracted driver and insurance wouldn't pay enough for a replacement.)

I can't keep living the way that I'm living. My family is draining me and its blocking opportunities for socializing and making connections. Additionally, I'm not sure how long I can keep counting on my family. I am expecting more tragedies, because I can see the writing on the wall. So I need to find another source of income that will give me enough to get a car and a place of my own. The trouble is I have absolutely no idea where to begin at this point. Web development seems impossible get jobs for anymore, and that's for people who have been practicing their skills. I haven't, because I can really only do it when it's for a company with clear business needs, and I am not a business. On top of that, I don't know if my mental health will let me do something so cerebral anymore. It was all already getting difficult in the last couple years doing it with anxiety, memory lapses, attention issues, and lack of motivation.

Where do I even start with this?

Have you applied for disability? I ask because it’s better than nothing, but it also probably isn’t going to provide the incentive me you need to get back to supporting yourself independently.

If you still have to call in to your current job, which isn’t 40 hours, perhaps you are no longer able to work full time. It’s good that you have Medicaid in case you get sick, but I am at a loss with suggestions on where to go for the kind of income you would need to provide an apartment and a vehicle.

You can work some while on disability, but again it will not be enough to provide the things you want.

I believe the last web development job I had had unreasonable expectations for anyone, let alone me. They were trying to force one person to do the job of at least 4 distinct roles, plus an entire team of web developers. However that job was not physically as demanding as my current job, which even my manager (who has been doing this his whole life) says is pretty hard on the body. And that's on top of the fact that my career for the 10 years prior was all office work, so I am not acclimated to it.

BTW sorry for replying so late. I'm having trouble with notifications from this forum.

I was in a similar situation - had a high paying job in corporate finance when my life imploded due to mental health and addiction issues. Was unemployed and honestly not well enough to work for a long time. I got on provincial disability insurance, which let me survive. Once I felt well enough to do something, I started with volunteering, which gave me structure, and something current to put on my resume and a current reference. That volunteering led directly to my current job, working on a telephone mental health support line as a peer support worker. Definitely not as much money as I'd made in finance but I like the job,

Something to consider is maybe doing some career exploration with an employment councillor. Not sure how things work in the US but where I am some non profits have employment counsellors that will work with people on figuring out what kinds of jobs they could do and what if any retraining might be necessary.

Good luck.