The voice in my head says, "You're not okay, you're not okay, you're not okay."
I try to ignore it. When I sleep, I sleep too little or too much. It's never enough. I have the most vivid dreams. Negative and positive.
I've been steadily gaining weight for a year. I'd say a pound a day, but that's an exaggeration.
I have to write out a budget over and over and over again. I called my mom at work today and asked her how much the water/electric was and when it was due and when she told me she'd tell me when I got home I broke down and cried.
I've picked up smoking again. I resent myself because of it.
I've walked more than an hour every day this week. I only feel good when I'm walking even though I'm fat and exhausted the whole time.
Can someone tell me the Lamictal ramp up? I quit my lamictal over 3 months ago and I'm ashamed to tell my doctor. Maybe I should call my pharmacy.
I feel crazy. Crazy is a nasty mean word.