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Sep 18, 2009, 11:47 AM
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Member Since: Jul 2009
Location: Phoenix, AZ, USA
Posts: 2,779
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I could write a book of my own opinions about what effected her development but it would be all my opinions which don't really mean a lot since I'm not a professional. I do have a lot of empathy for your friend, tho. My parents were both alcoholic. In addition, they had their own issues which were passed down to my siblings and I. Neither of them could pull off an intimate relationship with their children and because of it, my brothers married their high school sweethearts right out of high school (they were starved for love) and that wasn't a bad thing, it worked out for them. However, my sister and I both had major issues because our mother could not show love to us and always seemed unhappy. Hence, we both grew up thinking children made you unhappy and my sister never had children. I, on the other hand, spent a good portion of my life in therapy and searching for answers to my life issues and eventually resolved those feelings and became a mother late in life. (Age 41)
I agree with Jerrymichele in that your friend has a lot of issues that can be successfully addressed with a therapist. Her story, alone, is a wonderful example of what one can accomplish with determination and perseverance. She has overcome so many obstacles. Her deeper emotional issues will take some time but can be dealt with. She can find happiness and healthy relationships by working with a professional who can guide her through the issues.
You are a very good friend to her. I would say, stand by her. You never know where things might go. 
__________________
 Vickie
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