Wow KD- I remember very clearly now that i never thought I would live past 18, then 20, then 23 then 25 etc... It never occurred to me that I would have a future. I have never heard anyone say this. I didnt remember it until you just posted it. And I didnt really "get it" that I was on this earth for a while until I had children. I never thought anything mattered because I could always take the easy way out and kill myself or just die because of my risky behavior. I never saw a future for myself that included consequences for my actions. That is, even if I had known that I was getting myself into trouble, which I think I never realized the extent to which I could hurt myself.

Thanks for posting that to me, I forgot all about that reasoning that I had then.