Oh WOW. Sorry to drag out this thread, but I am back from my sesssion.

Crying, crying, crying. SO many tears. Even T had tears. There was just SO MUCH SADNESS there

I thought on the way home about the question someone asked here (was it griffinp?) about how to just let go and let it all out. And I think that for me, we've kind of spiraled around and around this stuff for the past 2 1/2 years and are finally THERE, at the hardest, saddest, most hurt part of me. And there's just TEARS there. It's sad. There's nothing to DO but cry.

T brought up the e-mail at the end of session and said how much wisdom there was in it. I love him for accepting me so much.

I asked if he was frustrated, and he said that he gets frustrated that I can't see what he can see. But he's not angry. And I asked how many times I could tell the stories, and he said I needed to tell them over and over again until I have power over them. And I asked how long it's allowed to take and he said "one day plus forever".

But, ouch. My head hurts. It's just so hard.