thank you everyone for your replies. it does mean a lot to deli.
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Originally Posted by treehouse
There's no way to know what lies ahead. Don't deprive yourself of a chance to find out.
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i have a bracelet which i wear permanently to remind me of something similar to what your friend says to himself. the problem is i'm no longer curious about what might be in the future. i feel awful for saying that, because it feels like i'm being stubborn, but it's also the truth and i don't want to come here and lie.
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Originally Posted by pachyderm
That's a conclusion you came to, not one that you know he came to. And if that is the conclusion he did come to, that is him, not you, not everybody else.
Other than those wise  words, I think I understand where you are at the moment (being in a related place myself). Not sure what to do about it. Sucks, doesn't it? |
thanks, pachy. i'm not really upset with him; i know he's been down about his ex and we'd been talking about that for a while now. i think it's important for him to figure things out with his ex; even if it is to accept that maybe she doesn't want him back now. i'd be genuinely sad for him too, if she said that.
to be honest, i think he probably did do the right thing in not staying. it just sucks that he would have stayed if i'd been open to fooling around. nevermind, i guess. i evidently got through the night ok by myself.
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Originally Posted by mobius
To go along with your post title, what would responding, rather than reacting ideally look like for you?
The circumstances you've described do sound so very overwhelming. My hope is that "responding" involves some sort of self-care...
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reacting right now feels like... having to do the things i have to do. go to the drs, find a job, finalise my uni withdrawal etc. responding would be... recognising that i dont want any of this, and that i do have an opportunity to make all of this not part of my life anymore. that feels like taking control of the situation, rather than the situation dictating what i need to do. i'm sick of reacting.
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Originally Posted by imapatient
1. Re: Austin-T, you need him for more than "talking you out of it," you need a T to help you cope with the massive, multiple losses you've just suffered. I think you should see Austin. If somehow he won't deal with you, you need immediate help still.
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just sent austin-t a txt. he's in at an interstate conference this week.
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2. Are there any community clinics or other places you can go to seen ASAP by a T? You shouldn't be alone, and I can't imagine that Austin wouldn't help if it's not presented as sui counseling. (How he won't help with that is beyond me.)
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yeah, but none that i would take up. i havent had good experiences with them in the past. they do more damage than good.
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3. I think you need to get pdoc to respond IMMEDIATELY--have his office contact him to let him know you need to talk to him. Have Austin get through to him. This is your time of greatest need since you've been on PC. Don't let it go. pdoc is your best ally.
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im angry with pdoc and how difficult it is to get in touch with him these days. i dont really want to try with him anymore.
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4. You have so many things that are so serious going on right now. You need to recognize that you're probably not thinking fully clearly. All these setbacks can do that to you, plus you have a situation with your processing being compromised due to medication side-effects.
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i know i'm probably not thinking the best. but i'm thinking the best that i can given the situation and that's all that i can aim for. people have to make decisions all the time without the best circumstances for thinking things through.