this is heartbreaking. I am so proud of you, Jexa. I didn't even read your whole post because it was too much. I can't imagine coming to that last-time-I'll-ever-see-you place with my T, and yet I know I will be there someday. How you get through that is a mystery to me. But you're doing it, Jexa. I'm so proud of you. And my heart hurts for you.
I love you.