I too was confused and I don't think reacting in anger to amandalouise was necessary. She didn't mean any harm by her post. She seemed to just be "wondering out loud" because she wasn't sure what you were talking about. As she said, if you want people to understand your system, you need to be receptive to questions. You are right when you say that everyone's system is different. So in order for people to understand what we mean we often have to actually tell them rather than getting upset when they ask valid questions.

As a side note, I do know someone with DID who in the process of integrating two alters (a male and a female), instead of coming together as one part, they came together by falling in love and having a baby alter instead. So this sort of thing can happen but everyone is different.