so scared of my t session coming on monday. im scared what she may say will cause me to s/i more. i already do too much. i emailed her about figuring something out. and she wants to talk about it. im just scared im wrong about it maybe. if im not it will be ok. otherwise i dont know what my reaction is going to be. im ok now because im not sure and its not real yet. maybe i am right and it will be fine. im so scared of what the truth might be. either i was right or incredibly wrong. i dont want to be wrong. s/i-ing is how ill end up dealing with it if i am. this post has no hope. sorry.