Sorry for the excessive replies... I'm still getting used to this site. :P

Byz/Sunna: My husband actually despises being "dad." I have been a person that defers to others all my life. It was how I was raised, and how I have always been in my relationships. His complaint is that I have been forcing him to make all my decisions from my inaction and inattentiveness and am, therefore, making him live my life for me. He really wants me to be more independent and a stable partner so that we function more as a team.

Hankster: Sometimes I feel that he is invalidating me, but I think I am just being sensitive to his upset feelings. When things aren't so heated and in-the-moment, my husband acknowledges that I have my own problems (i.e. ADD, anxiety) and that I need time to address them. He is a reasonable person in all this, but I suppose being in a relationship where you don't feel the other person doesn't care about you gets pretty defeating. Neither of us want to give up on this. I just need to get some outside perspective on all this at times.

I appreciate the compliment about being coherent. I know that I am actually much more eloquent and thoughtful when I write rather than when I speak. My emails with my husband have gone a lot better than actual face-to-face conversations. One of my friends suggested using more text communication, but sometimes it's not feasible for the situation.

Thank you all for your concern and your comments! I'm willing to further describe the relationship if there are still some muddy areas.