(((( granite )))) rant away, we will listen!
You are working on it, whether you think so or not. If you weren't, the thought of it woudn't enter your head.
Maybe you could go to the search block on the main PC page and see if they have any blog entries about mindfulness; this place has huge resources and you might find something that will - gently - help you along till you see yr T again. Good for you, you are still in there fighting. Your efforts will bear fruit in the proper time!