I am 16 years old, turning 17 in a month. I have been suffering with something for almost 2 years now and it has effected my life greatly. In fact, it has taken over my life to the point where I don't even feel like I'm living. Problem is, I don't know that this problem is?

Starting freshman year of I was very outgoing and had alot of friends. I had a girlfriend who meant the world to me. We went out for a couple months, me being a stupid teenager fell in love with this girl. Months later, I got dumped and I felt lost. I thought that feeling was temporary. But that feeling of being lost and depressed continued for the whole summer. It progressively got worse. I do not have feelings for that girl anymore, but I think this event triggered something.. Idk. Either way, here I am my junior year of highschool. Struggling to stay alive. I think of suicide every single day of my life. I am miserable, yet I have absolutely no reason to be. I have a good group of close friends, about 6 or 7 really true bros who we always have each others backs and we hangout alot. But besiseds them, at school I honestly don't talk to too many people. It's weird.. At school I CANNOT act like myself. I am quiet, I just stare off into nothing and I just feel so uptight and not laid back like I used to be. I am currently on adderol for ADHD ever since start of sophmore year. The doctor figured my depression and lack of focus was because of ADHD and just overlooked the fact that I was depressed and thought of self harm. My hands are always sweaty and under my armpits sweat as well when I am just sitting there doing nothing! Just this makes my life harder because I need to worry about it.. My issues just get worse and worse, and I just keep getting more lost and lost as time goes on..

This is what goes on in my head: I do not believe I am here. I believe I'm in the driver seat, and my life is on cruise control. I talk to my self conscience all the time and over-think stuff way to much. I see all the other high-school kids who at school are all outgoing and whatnot, and I want to be that so bad but something is stopping me... I want to be in control of my thoughts, in control of my life, I want to be happy, I want to stay alive and not commit suicide.

This is me reaching out for help. Please, tell me what you think I could have..