I agree with everything Leed wrote.

You are not used or soiled. You know, some people enjoy sex with multiple partners. I am not saying whether that view is right or wrong, just that it is an alternative view.

So you experimented. You did what you had to do to get through those bad times. You are lucky to have people who love you helping through this, and I hope you will find a counselor, too.

One thing I noticed in your message was how reliant you are to having this relationship with a new fella in your life. I hope you will develop a sense of self-worth and self-esteem that does not flow from what he or anyone else thinks about you.

I am 64, and here's an example of what happens when we get self-esteem from another person. My elderly mother was taken from her home by Social Services because she was not taking care of herself. I spent a day crying because I could not do what she wants for her own good. Then I realized she has always manipulated me by withholding love.

I am in that position because I depend on her approval to feel good.

Enjoy your new relationship. But please also work to build a solid self-concept and Be Your Own Woman. There is lots of time for you to work on that.

Wishing you all the best with love.