I'm guessing you did this in hopes things had changed over time. Now that you know things haven't changed, you know not to do this again, right?

If this is a one-time thing, I wouldn't stress too much over it. After all, if he'd said yes to your questions, you might have resurrected a many-years relationship that was obviously important enough to you to consider marrying this guy.

HOWEVER, if this is the USUAL way your relationships go, then you might want to see a counselor or therapist to sort it out. Constantly going after people who don't want to be in a relationship with us is a sign that something is wrong.

I see myself in your story. I wasted 14 years of my life chasing after a guy who gave me mixed messages about our relationship. Instead of walking away, I kept hanging around "hoping" it would change. Of course it did not change. Eventually I gave up and left. (DUH!)

My suggestion? Get a therapist or counselor IF this is a repeated theme in your life, OK?


Anne