Well, at the time I did not want to write the wrong words as I had just joined as a member. I was not sure whether anything I wrote would be posted til later, then I lost track because I had to focus on my problems. I guess the major problem here in forums is to be able to acknowledge what is bothering myself and not feeling guilty about whether I am expressing it in the best way possible. For example, a fear of what I write causing me more problems than what i already have. Of knowing that today, there is less face to face interactions. At this time, for me, there's the forums and the phone number/name/voice. So blunting my connection to people.
But as you can read, I have swings of mood. fear/depression modes. So, now I can write to you that I understand your feelings of down. i support your struggle to continue on and see that you are not alone!