I thought it might get to you, it was getting to me! My t said this week, he was lucky to have this kind of job, where he gets to do stuff like this, ie be there for people? but I do notice a change in myself. even though he's my T, before I couldn't even ask him in a polite way how he was doing - now I can. before, I really was too narcissistic, but I couldn't accept a glass of water. now, I can insist on a clean glass! it's weird.

As hankster reminds us, it's a process, not a sudden thing; if you don't like "professional", drop that word for awhile! Do you "need" it? I don't need the word but my T said it, so how can I ignore it when she asked me "do I know about my other professionals in my life" (their personal life).

My T said she thought I was "kind but critical" and I had a heck of a time with that "critical", even though I know it has two sides (and I am very good at seeing/judging the two sides and being "fair"/honest) and does not mean I am just negatively judgmental.

If nothing else, it is just a word, a tool for your use; if you have no need for that tool right now, don't like how you are using it, don't use it! T is not just professional, not just therapist, not just female, not just married, not just a lover, not just a mother, not just a daughter, not just a college grad, not just a well-paid worker, etc. Those are mostly roles, not the person and we constantly morph in and out of various roles and add/subtract personal attributes to them as the situation calls for. One can be an "angry lover", why not a "loving professional"? Play with your words; they're yours and take on the meanings you give them!

As an RN I get a bit...grrhh... when you try to seperate proffessional and care with this whole black and white thinking.
umm-just thinking, my d. is an RN too, and I'm proud of her. This is a different d. from the one I just visited. I think of her as my "loving d" and as a professional in a positive way! My other d. is a professional too. I wonder why I get so angry about my T then. Because I am NOT the professional?
Can you look the word up...the "real" definition is not being cold and not caring and maybe it won´t trigger you as much.

I think its good that you realize part of your hate for it is out of jealousy that she gets to call herself professional... but you shouldn't use her as a measuring stick, makes me wonder if you have put her on a pedestal of sorts. Your really upset that she is making you actually address the fact that you aren't BFF's and she is an employee hired by you to help you. It doesn't mean that your feelings for her and hers for you aren't real, we are all human and all put our pants on one leg at a time. You can't help but feel something for someone you tell all your secrets too and spend that much time with. It is real , its just not forever and for always, its more of a model to help you find relationships that will meet your needs in a healthy way and be forever and for always. I know your having a hard time with this, but being angry with her and nit picky over words isn't going to make this process any easier....maybe this is the part where you need to mourn? Big hugs..... I'm sorry you are hurting.