What responses . Thanks all. I left this and didn't come back and now read everything and feel better.

Paid FMLA isn't an option for me. I had to use all my paid time for my own illnesses or my daughter's mental health issues (she was hospitalized a couple times).

I am starting to feel better, but that's mostly because I forced myself to think as differently as I can. I try to re-think reactions from others so I don't just assume they're mad at me. I do allow myself breaks when I'm overwhelmed. It's not perfect, but I can show up at least.

While here, I do find it hard to get through the day because I can't concentrate on the big projects so well and I really hate talking to other people. I keep doing that impossible to do - opposite to emotion action where I just talk to people anyway. It's so draining.

For everyone, hang in there. It's so hard and even though activity is good for depression, it's not easy. That's the simple answer and not the real one. I'm also still afraid to ask to work from home during my episodes. I could get my doctor to write something, but the politics at work could cause issues.