I'm alive. I wish I could stop distancing myself from people. Too much going on, too much in my head. Maybe I should start journaling again. But then I feel like it should be heard, but I don't want to bother people with my rambling thoughts.

I wish I had the courage to do the things I need to but I'm too afraid. Also, waiting...waiting games suck. Next Tuesday I see a pdoc for the first time. I get to talk about my anxiety/ depression issues and push for an aspergers eval. That's going to be the hardest part for me. To lower my guard and stop hiding all my symptoms, so that I can get the most accurate help. To stop downplaying it all as if it's nothing- when in reality it's disabling.

sigh.