I plan on getting into therapy. I really enjoyed the few sessions I had with my T. She was a psychologist. I think a lot of my depression comes from how I think. I don't think the whole biological imbalance thing fits me. For me it usually happens where an event triggers overwhelming feelings and I start to decline into depression. Early in my life I had no idea what was happening. I just knew I felt sad all the time and had no way to cope. Now I usually recognize what makes me feel sad and I think about I can interpret and feel about those events.
For example, I'm taking my final two classes I need to satisfy the requirements to take a professional exam. Earlier this week we had a review exam based on some fundamental stuff. I didn't do study or practice for it at all. I ended up with a 65%. The 18 year old me would have been hurt by this. I would have thought I was a failure at math and couldn't do anything right. The me now challenges the inner critic. I tell myself, on the exam I missed a couple minus signs, and had a couple arithmetic errors. Then I say the exam is such an small portion of the class it doesn't matter. Then I reassure myself by saying I passed Calc III with an A. Someone who can't do math doesn't pass Calc III with an A. I think not giving into these feelings is half the battle.
On a different subject, I know my wife would understand how I am feeling with depression. She suffered from it too for a while after she left an abusive boyfriend a couple years before we met. At the time she was dating him, she basically said she smoked pot all the time because she felt miserable. She had a falling out with her family and moved in with him. She then felt trapped. She eventually got sick of it, and patched things up with her family and dumped him. She said she was pretty depressed after the whole experience and was on anti-depressants for a while. I know she would understand what I am going through, but every time I try to talk to her about this stuff I get a knot in my stomach and can't talk. Maybe when I start going to therapy I can figure out where all this comes from and how to deal with it.