I have been in relationship for a man with 3 years. We live together in a nice home with my 2 children (not his). There are many things about him a love (his sense of adventure, the fun things we do together, his sense of humor, his desire to succeed). When I fell in love with him, he was very sweet and charming. He would talk about marriage, dreams and plans for the future, etc. I felt very assured in our relationship at one time.

Slowly and progressively, however, things have been getting worse. One time, I found he had profiles on dating websites with photos taken while we were dating. He denied it and I ultimately let it go. Then he had gone out one night with friends and gotten so drunk he called his ex (who supposedly ruined his life) to pick him up. When he got home, he was less than kind. I helped him into bed and he went so far as to smack me and laugh about half a dozen times. I told him when he woke up because I knew he didn't remember. He apologized about the first part and said I was lying about the hitting part. I let that go, too. Barely.

He has gotten mad at me for venting to a friend about these situations. He tells me I should be loyal. He considers it "talking *****" about him and that is "the worst thing you can do". He was so mad over me talking to my friend (it got back to him clearly) that he broke up with me and moved out with no warning one time, leaving me nothing - not even a bed to sleep on.

We reconciled and things seemed great for awhile. However, what I consider emotional abuse has gotten out of control. I am not saying I am perfect. nobody is perfect and nobody has a perfect relationship. But I genuinely do care and do try.

Just today, he called me a "*****" in front of my daughters and when my 6 year old defended me he said "hopefully you won't be a "*****" like your mom someday and make a man miserable". She's 6. And my 9 year old was right there.

He's told me everyone thinks I am crazy, all my friends don't like me, nobody likes me, I am mentally ill, I am a psycho, I am a bad mom, I am lazy, I don't do anything, I am cheap, I am trailer trash....really the list could go on. Things that are really hard to forgive and forget.

He spends a lot of time with his friends (who are single) doing whatever he wants and when I try and do anything he tries to control it. He doesn't invite me along places or make me feel welcome. In fact, his friends and family invite me along and make me feel more welcome more than he does.

He makes more money than me and I believe he thinks I will stay with him due to that reason. I believe he thinks he can control me due to that reason. However, he purchased the home we are in by his own choice (my name is not on it) and he would have bought it even if we were not together. I would have never bought this home because I can not afford to live here.

I do contribute what I can. I pay rent. I pay utilities. I buy groceries. I clean the entire house and I work full time and have 2 children. I also help with his 2 dogs.

I don't know why I am not good enough. I don't know what to do. I am scared and I feel like a loser for putting my children in this situation. I have told him how I feel and tried to make it better a MILLION time to no avail. He's not going to change.

Help?