This may sound stupid, (and I don't fear sounding stupid anymore, but maybe I should) but I've found that whenever at my breaking point, I found that all I needed was a good long nap. People on this site know I have sleep apnea, but i think it has something to do with my schitzoaffective illness too. how many different meds have you tried in your life? Were you diagnosed with any other mental health issues? How often do you get to see your doc or T? I find if I can't see my T as scheduled i get all cranky and feel left out. I also feel like sleeping all the time sometimes which is no good either. I am trying to come up with some suggestions for you, I hope you don't hurt yourself, that would really make me feel bad!!!!!!!!!Please call someone if you do.