Quote:
Originally Posted by yellowted
if you acknowledge an alter of a young age, and give plenty of reassurance to it then regularly plan things into your weekly routine to keep it happy, it can sit back and relax, by this i mean it can stop bothering you and stay quiet in the depths of your mind. i am not saying it goes away, just relaxes enough that you 'forget' about it for a while. obviously when you do the planned things it will surface but will be a happy alter rather than anxious/sad/angry etc
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question: but is that "forget" about it ....really forgetting or losing co consciousness....
my guess is no because if you really have forgotten about it then you wouldnt be doing things for it to keep it happy and relaxed like giving it reassurance, planning things the alter likes, ...
the original poster wants to know whether its possible to lose the ability to be co conscious with an alter now that they are no longer in therapy.
doing things to please and keep alters happy is different then being co conscious /losing co consciousness....
example I know one of my alters would be unhappy if I didnt plan into the menu peanutbutter and jelly sandwhiches. I wasnt co conscious with this alter to the point of knowing her/feeling her but I was co conscious (sharing information) through finding drawings. the drawings would depict a stick figure with an ugly face expression with other foods on a plate and happy face when the drawing depicted a peanut butter and jelly sand which. keeping this alter "happy" had nothing to do with our co consciousness abilities coming and leaving. in fact whether she was happy or sad and shared or not her pictures the amount of co consciousness never changed.
another example I was co conscious with another alter. I knew when she was happy sad what ever by what she said to me inside. again whether I kept her happy or sad our amount of co consciousness never changed.
my therapist has a word for times when I was trying to be a people pleaser/trying to keep my alters as happy as possible instead of letting them be who they are, instead of letting them do their job, purpose, reason for being.... she called it brown nosing/a kiss up.
and to some extent I was trying to kiss up and brown nose with my alters trying to make them be the way I wanted them to be but in the end it didnt work they still did their job purpose and reason why they were there. and whether I was brown nosing or trying to kiss up to the alters to keep them happy/relaxed it still did nothing to the amount of coconsciousness/lack of co consciousness that I had.