Hi Cherry73,

I don't really do "advice"; but I will share my experiences as a single mom of 2 adult kids.

Your daughter is five years old. Wow. "ungrateful" has hissy fits when you do not do what she wants you to do.

I take it you feel rather awful about yourself when you have to play the "meanie" (say "no" to going, doing everything she wants to do) ? But you have to say "no"; sometimes?

All parents have to say "no" at times. These are boundaries you need to set for her. She needs to learn that a "no" from Mom is a "no" and respect your wishes; otherwise, as she gets older; she will always expect to get her way in all ways from you and from LIFE!

For myself? I stood my ground when my kids were little. I played the "bad guy" and set limits. When they had tantrums; I did what people call "Time Out" these days--I did the worst thing, I told them to go to their rooms and have their tantrums. Then, I ignored them for the entire time.....which they still say was the worst thing I did to them...they could not stand to have me ignore them.

I gather that you feel somewhat guilty when you have to lay down the law?

Don't. Kids need a firm, but loving hand...saying "no" to a child lets them know that you love them. Consistency, schedules, firmness on your part/discipline are needed for all children.

I hope something I have written here helps?

You are not a bad mom because you do not allow your daughter to do anything she wants!
You are a wonderful mom! So much more difficult to be a strong example for your daughter; especially as a single mom. It is so important that you do so; in the long run, she will have respect for you as her mom.

KUDOS!! It is not easy to be both a mother and a father to a child.

You are very strong.

hug? virago