Today I found out for sure that my closest friend whom I've known for 5 years is moving across the country. Another friend/aquantance is leaving the country for a year. This comes at a time after my two dogs died a couple months ago.

My T is also going on vacation next week.

I'm a total mess. I'm feeling abandoned and alone. My birthday is next week and I feel like I'll be lucky if anyone remembers it.

I hate goodbye's. Why does it always feel like once I get attached to someone they end up leaving me.

I hope my T doesn't plan on leaving me too. I can't handle one more thing right now. I called my T and she should hopefully be calling me back tonight. I want her to tell me that she's coming back. I can't handle one more painful goodbye.

When growing up I never had reassurance of love or reliability, only abuse. I was neglected and I understand that's where my fear and sadness is coming from yet it doesn't make it any less painful.